I don’t know how you found us. Are you a student at University of Toronto who heard about the Warren Farrell lecture and protest, or you have read the notices about our being blacklisted by powerful forces on the Internet? Or are you in a relationship with a man who has been dragged through the family court by a bitter ex? Or have you come to worry that your son is doing poorly at school or is opting out of society, and you are trying to understand? Or has your brother been falsely accused of rape or domestic violence?
I know you are lurking there, as I did for a couple of months. This place is a bit of a shock to the system. There are a lot of reasons why you might be afraid to identify as part of the Men’s Human Rights Movement (MHRM). Lets talk about those:
Some of these guys are so angry
Yes, some are. Many of the men who get here have been through some pretty nasty experiences. Some are women angry about things men and boys they love have gone through. They are understandably angry. Despite what a you might have been told growing up, being angry is a normal and healthy human emotion. Maybe if you are honest with yourself, you are here because you are angry about how a man or boy in your life is being treated. I found my way here because I was trying to get my head around the experiences of my Beloved, as a man who experienced abuse in a marriage and is experiencing misandry in the family courts. Get me to speak about the damage done to him and to his daughters by the “family terrorist” and her enablers in the family court and you will quickly pick up I am pretty angry myself. You’ve got to remember, these guys are angry but it is not directed at you personally. Some are pretty pessimistic about women as a whole, and if we respect that their mistrust comes from experience, instead of shaming them for it, we may learn things we need to learn, sometimes painful things but important nonetheless.
I’ll be flamed for saying something stupid
Possibly. If so, learn from it. It feels pretty crappy to get flamed, but if you can get past the feelings, some of the things said in response to your words will help you see things from different angles. The discipline needed is to separate feelings from thoughts: it’s something you can learn with practice, but you got to start by interacting so you can learn.
These guys are anti-relationship, anti-family – I want both in my future
This isn’t a dating site. But as the Men’s Human Rights Movement continues to gain followers and gain traction, odds of you finding a man who’s interested in these issues will go up, whether you stick around here or not. I wouldn’t worry much. If you get into a relationship with a Zeta Male you are probably lucky. You will find most of these men to be caring, compassionate, gentle, and honest souls, who are pretty up front about what they want or don’t want, even if they are still wounded in some areas. On the other hand, there are some guys – and I don’t even want to hazard a guess at the percentage – who are Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW), and looking at the bum deal most men get from the legislation and court system that surrounds marriage and divorce, and they don’t want a committed relationhip with a woman. I don’t blame them, when you realize what can and does happen to many of them. But there are guys here with children, with partners, with wives even. There are young guys here who I am sure want children and want partners. The big thing if you are going to go into a relationship with a guy who refuses to let others define him, and who believes he has all the same rights you do, is there can be no assumptions as to your respective roles and duties within a relationship. It needs to be negotiated and discussed. Who knows, your Zeta coupling might end up looking quite traditional to those looking in on it, but it may not. It will be your own matter and your own concern, but it needs your care, respect and attention if you are going to maintain integrity as a Men’s Human Rights Advocate. In any case, this site is not about your personal relationships, it’s for those of you who care about the men and boys in your life. And it is about their issues, not yours.
I believe women can do anything, I don’t like some of the attitudes towards gender I see here, particularly when issues such as women serving in the military or getting places in STEM courses.
I also believe women can do anything – within biological limits. I’m shorter and have less muscular strength than probably 95% of the guys on here. I wouldn’t be able to do 1/2 of what was expected of me to be in a combat role (laying aside I am a committed pacifist and would be a conscientious objector), so I am prepared to accept from a physical perspective I can’t meet the standards needed for soldiering. There are some things women can do better than men, but there are plenty of men who can do those things as well. As for the rigorous academic standards required of STEM programmes – yes, we can achieve them, if we are prepared to make sacrifices like the men and women who have made it there already. I know too many female doctors who once they get to the point they have specialized, doubt their choice to have gone into medicine in the first place. The thing those women have in common: they are trying to be a consultant, and a mother, and they are constantly fighting against the thing that got them into their training in the first place. The unhappy women I see had to be single minded to get into medicine, and by trying to be several things at once they can’t be single minded – they can’t be the best. I am not saying women who want to be in STEM fields should not have children. What I am saying is we need to accept that if they have children their career paths are going to be at a slower trajectory than when they don’t–or, accept a partnership with a man who takes on most of the duties at home and thus makes less money than you, and not think less of yourself, or more important, think less of him, because of that choice.
Yes, workplaces can accommodate working mothers – in my own family there have been two women who have had “job share” roles during their children’s younger years. My eldest sister took this along with her partner taking time out for some of the child raising. She and I have very similar professional responsibilities at this time, yet I’ve been working 10 years less than her – but the 10 “missing years” were the years she was part-time, and she has no regrets. If we women are going to have self-respect, we need to work out what we want and be prepared to sacrifice – and that might involve making choices that run contrary to society’s message of “I can have it all.” No you can’t. No one can.
What if I get hit on by one of these guys?
That will probably happen less here than elsewhere. But you might I suppose get lucky and land a guy who is as great as my Beloved. No, seriously, sexual interest and attraction happens between humans as they get to know each other. Equal relationships, be they friendships or something more intimate involve both parties making choices. If you don’t want to “spoil a good friendship” then it is OK to say “No, thanks”. In my experience (and I have recent experience of this), your “no” will be respected. It might even make the friendship stronger.
Is it safe meeting fellow MHRAs in real life?
I’ve met a few. I hope to meet more. Standard operating procedure based on anyone I meet online applies. Neutral public venue, independent transport and my escape route planned. That’s just common sense for anyone of either sex. After a while, you might meet in each other’s homes, spend time in more private spaces, and so on, but that’s after you get to know someone. That shouldn’t be different for men or women, and isn’t.
I like being feminine, I get the feeling that’s not OK around here
What do you mean by feminine? If it means expecting female privilege and special treatment because you’re a woman, you are out of luck. If it means celebrating your femininity, you are probably in for some pleasant surprises. Once we stop demonizing men, and start valuing masculinity, we start being able to explore femininity, not the pseudo-feminine competitive crap that passes for “femininity” in society.
I really struggle with the whole “register-her.com” thing
Honestly, I struggle with some of it too. But many, like Harriet Harman deserve to be there with spades on, and there are countless men on “sexual offender” registries around the world who’ve done far less than what the violent protestors at the University of Toronto did in late 2012. That registry is for public officials who’ve said and done horrible things, or individuals who have a) acted in an unlawful manner, and b) they had public profiles including boasts about things they had done – so they were already “public property.” Their names are public information, not secrets.
I don’t get the “sammich” jokes
Don’t worry – it is because us female MHRA’s are thought to be traditional women serving their men sandwiches and waiting on them hand and foot. Since being in a relationship with a Zeta man, I’ve been more nurtured and pampered than I ever was in a more traditional relationship. In that loving and secure partnership, there is space for humor around our respective roles. I see the whole “sammich” humor as an extension of this – we get these jokes because we are valued as individuals and equals, not to be denigrated.
What if my female friends/boss etc find out I am an MHRM supporter?
Although there has been a recent increase in the number of MHRAs writing and being active under their actual names, some of us still use pseudonyms. I do, not because I would mind people finding out, but because at the time I started becoming active in the movement, I was dealing with a narcissist who decided I was a threat and was out to smear my reputation. I had to make a calculated decision over the risk to my career if this person found out I was an activist with a “notorious” group, and decided that the risk was too great. I will keep reviewing this and perhaps one day, I too will write in my own name. As for female friends etc finding out – one of the most rewarding conversations on the MHRM I have had is with my mother who was an active second-wave feminist. Don’t pre-judge people’s reactions, and be prepared to accept that if people don’t like your choices, perhaps they are not your friends.
I’ve got only a limited amount of time to contribute to the MHRM – I’m not going to be much use
Sending an email to your political representative doesn’t take much. Challenging misandric stereotypes in your own household doesn’t take much time. Sticking up the odd sticker (I would love to see some AVfM stickers in women’s toilets!) or reposting something on Facebook doesn’t take much time. But perhaps that action will bring another person to the Men’s Human Rights Movement, and then you’ve changed the world.
Remember, this is a human rights movement, and real human rights movements almost always are mis-characterized and almost all have some extremist elements within them. But this movement not about superior rights for one or the other. It’s about the same fundamental rights for everybody. And the responsibilities that go with those equal rights. And you can be a part of making it grow.
Tags: explorer, honeybadgers
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JinnBottle:
QRG/ Elly:
Jay:
strix:
Now that’s a honeybadger attitude!
Men and women deserve to have the equitable and mutually-beneficial relationships denied them by both traditionalism and feminism.
Cannot wait to talk to some young kids and find out that they do not have these horrible ideas in their heads, just real respect and appreciation for, and commitment to, equality. it’s happening with race, kids are no longer thinking of themselves as cookie-cutter ‘black’ or ‘white’ or ‘hispanic’. people are reclaiming their right to decide who they are, not to have liberals tell them, and then also tell them when we’re ‘post-racial’. if you’re not a racist, you’re post racial, nuff said. and liberals, y’all are the last ones to actually embrace a non-racial way of looking at things. so how bout we tell y’all when things are ‘post-racial.’ then the liberals can focus their efforts on misandry and ‘sexism’.
Thumbs up and thank you, Aimee.
There are an accumulating number of Posts, or at least quotes & excerpts therefrom, by women here that I know would address issues of women I know who are not part of this site, but who have a sincere, willing-to-give and sacrifice, desire to see what used to be called the natural loving relationship between men and women, brought along and alive into the 21st century.
This is one of them. (Cue “Dragnet” music.)
“Remember, this is a human rights movement, and real human rights movements almost always are mis-characterized and almost all have some extremist elements within them. But this movement not about superior rights for one or the other. It’s about the same fundamental rights for everybody. And the responsibilities that go with those equal rights. And you can be a part of making it grow.”
This alone made the article. This is what I signed on for.
Damn that was pretty great
Thumbs up for the article Aimee.
However, I still want your cat
He’s lying on my lap at the moment…he is open to offers. His brother who is the smart one of the pair will negotiate any contractual terms.
Aimee, splendid…
Men’s rights – regardless whether it is called “Men’s Rights” or “Men’s Human Rights” — is counter to the coercive power of the centralized and unaccountable State. I would hope that the “human” does not connote an endorsement of the utopian Statist social engineering materialistic cult ideology of the Humanist Manifesto: (“human” with an “ism” attached). And I would hope that nobody is seduced by the bait-and-switch nightmare United Nations Convention on Human Rights, which claims that individual rights are not natural, but instead are conferred by elite bureaucrats, and are thus, as clearly, state revocable, when the State finds it expedient to do so.
There is no such thing as “group rights.” Rights are individual.
I hope your voice is heard.
Honestly, I have the same fear.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=ZsmW9hfirTY
That seems to be Mr. Chapin’s take on it. I could swear his channel was hijacked by Futrelle this past Monday. I don’t know if it was intentional or if he could really be that uninformed, but he conflated human rights with the Humanism movement, he addressed the wrong ERA, and he claimed not to know what a SoCon is. (Really???) Coincidentally, his video precisely mirrors the attacks from SoCons, of which I’m seeing an increase – no doubt in response to our demands for genuine legal equality. He considers the SoCon/Traditionalist to be “a straw man,” and apparently has yet to figure out who it was that allowed feminism to take over our government and our culture.
I’d say that feminists have (once again) manipulated their chivalrous White Knights into donning their shining armor and riding into battle, as I believe has been predicted more than once on this site.
Sorry if I just crapped in the punch bowl.
“I would hope that the “human” does not connote an endorsement of the utopian Statist social engineering materialistic cult ideology of the Humanist Manifesto: (“human” with an “ism” attached).”
Well, whether you’re on the right, or the left, (and I’ve been both) “human rights” for men does fly in the face of the current Marxist feminist political paradigm that lives in the big tent of the Democrat left. And it also flies in the face of the conservative (Capitalist) big tent that has too often (historically) valued male productive resources more than male lives.
Male disposability in social programs like VAWA, Offices of Health, and education programs is unacceptable so is males disposability in jobs and war.
I’m pretty sure both main parties have other significant shortcomings in their agendas, regarding fair and equitable treatment of males.
To be fully forthcoming, I personally despise Democrats the most, because that’s where the gender feminists live who’ve initiated so much of the misandry I’ve experienced, but I think the time has come to take on both for all the past and present misandry. Of course, you’re free to have your own, strongest, personal political dislikes.
I say take them both on where they live. If Democrats want to be big spenders, then they better spend equally on males as well as females.
http://tinyurl.com/85mdl8r
If Republicans want to be the party of small government, then they should stop all their votes for wasteful spending on feminists pork (programs) – and that’s a lot. End the feminist pork Republicans hypocritically keep voting for.
http://tinyurl.com/77sbg9u
Either way, we should all remember that our voices count so make them heard loud, long, and clear, IMO.
http://tinyurl.com/2f8ows3
http://tinyurl.com/ay4n8gt
Ray,
I am with you on that one all the way up here in Canada.
Acme Fem & co. does not care which party it whores itself out to or extorts for money.
IMHO until we take care of what I see are the core issues (the injustice system) I just don’t believe we should be dedicating much time to this left right issue.
Men and boys are killing themselves making up 80% of the suicide population, families are being ripped apart even if they don’t want to or should be, children are growing up without their father’s, false allegations of d.v. and rape.
Every one of those issues destroys men and boys mentally and or physically and the carnage is vast with a ripple effect.
Both the left and the right need to know that their bigotry / hypocrisy in all these fields will not be tolerated and will be exposed. Period!
Canada has a freedom of association section. (s2; fairly sure all first world nations have this clause) that is a right that needs to be protected as well for if we as a movement start denying participation (not co-opting) by those of a different political view it makes us no better than the bigots we expose and fight against.
It also protects us from being prosecuted.
So what if Person A supports some social issues, or if Person B supports a libertarian point of view.
Do I care when they are writing an email to their local politician advocating that men get treated equitably in the injustice system?
Fuck no.
It is the message they carry to their local representative that matters.
That message;
Men’s Rights Are Human Rights.
Nothing more, a simple message, a simple truth and fact.
I advocate for what I see as the quickest way to stop the most harmful repercussions of feminist dogma in law, this does not mean I am a lefty.
I am sure some will see me that way and I respect your right to do so.
My political beliefs are nowhere near left, the No Dads Party (ndp) up here lost my vote long time ago, as did the fiberals and the p.c.’s, not a single one is doing a proper job for Canada and hasn’t done so for quite some time.
Damn longer reply than I thought,,lol just my take on this.
Without getting into an endless philosophical hairsplitting exercise, I would like to invoke James Madison’s arguments that America should have no Bill of Rights because rights are natural and should not be enumerated lest they be limited. Well, he wound up writing a Bill of Rights anyway.
The fact is that “men’s rights” has been conflated for too long, for better or worse, with a particular set of concepts that don’t necessarily reflect our message. If you embrace the idea that all men (and women) should have the same inalienable rights, then the words “human rights” should not disturb you.
Disagreeing with how the UN or some other groups have enumerated those basic human rights, to me, is another issue entirely. We can argue over specifics like that to a considerable degree, but until we make it clear that we seek the SAME rights for EVERYBODY (or as close as is biologically possible) we’ll always be branded as asking for “return to male privilege” (Orwellian phrasing that) rather than the same basic rights for everybody.
That’s how we see it here anyway.
Perfectly said, Robert. Thanks!
I could not agree more Robert. The minute this “human” thing started getting used, it made my vehemently anti-collective soul shudder with fear. Perhaps misplaced, misguided fear, but the track record has been pretty bad.
Great work Aimee in offering inoculation against fears some women may have joining the Men’s Human Rights Movement.
I vividly recall a decade or so ago feeling despondent and quite depressed at the lack of interest shown by women both in the media and in my life about men’s issues. Those days shrink into the distant past even more with your call to sisterly arms.
Thank you.
Congratulations on being a woman of compassion and action in our troubling times.
A great piece, worthy of our recommended reading section.
OK I’ll put it in there.
Thanks to a great editor – and you made it painless!
I loved this piece. I too, hope it gets placed and stays listed on the preferred reading section. There is so much power in your writing, so much truth, so much sense. Too, please make an extra effort to ensure it gets posted on other websites.
I believe such is true because men love women. Our love of women, as evidenced by the whopping number of comments (ALREADY!!), is showing. We DO want sensible, sharing and truly unselfish women to hang out with us. We are not anti-woman.
Your response about femininity? Perfect. The relatively few radical feminists have had a playing field all to their own when it comes to redefining femininity for ALL women, everywhere, about everything. It is VERY time for women to define it for themselves based on what they think they, themselves like and that what might turn nature back into anything but a bad word.
I am one of those “angry” MRA’s. (or used to be. I am mostly proud now). I sometimes write with a committed sense of direction that some women might fall for the trap of thinking men like me “hate” women. It is too easy for them to think that. But, it is just that I am telling what I think honesty embodies…what I have literally seen with my life experiences.
Do the women out there REALLY want lying cowards who act like pre-programmed machines but ready to abandon himself in order to revolve it all around her, her feelings, and what only she wants?
That is the last kind of woman that I want. But a woman like you, Aimee, would be wonderful. The man in your life is so lucky to have someone as understanding.
I deeply appreciate your ability, Aimee, to soothe and well, just be honest.
Going to get it out this weekend to a couple of other places with any luck.
I’ll tell you one thing, I’m the lucky one to have found my Beloved – I had quite literally come to a WGTOW decision when he came back into my life…I’d accepted I just wasn’t kitted out to be in a relationship.
Three and a bit years later and I’m still amazed at the depth and breadth of the feelings I have for him and stunned to find them returned.
My honesty has been a burden in the past, because it caused a fair bit of ‘othering’ from groups of women. Now, I just shrug and walk away if someone tries that on me. I have less acquaintances in my real life than at any time before, but my friends are all the more precious because they are free thinkers like me.
I do believe women are heavily socialised into ‘group-think’ – which is not an excuse, but rather an explanation. Breaking that pattern is hard – truth is I don’t know where I would say for a woman conditioned to group think to start in changing her script. Perhaps I need to think about it and write something on breaking the script!
Good article Aimee.
I would argue that there is no such thing as a female version of MGTOW. MGTOW is a conscious choice made while still having options. As in, a man decides that he’s opting out, not because he CAN’T get a woman, but because he’s decided that he doesn’t WANT a woman. As a man, your SMP value generally goes up as you age from 20->40.
As a woman, your SMP value goes down from 20->40. By the time most women decide that they are WGTOW, they no longer have any options. It is not a logical choice made while still having options, it is an excuse to cover the fact that you no longer HAVE options.
Ergo, WGTOW and MGTOW are not the same thing. One is a choice, the other is an excuse.
Good stuff, Aimee!
Damn fine article Aimee.
(I would love to see some AVfM stickers in women’s toilets!)
Know you’re a God fearing person and respect that, I believe there is a verse about asking and ye shall receive;
http://imgur.com/a/IV5ZT
Lmao yup give me a sticker a moral and ethical cause, toss in a bit of trampling on my rights as a human on the basis of sex and voila’
Kick ass peaceful warrior!
Cheers from across the pond to you and your beloved, enjoy a dram and smile for each other.
Oh I might show a bit of chivalry for Acme Fem & co.
I’ll hold the door open for them after their ass gets handed to them via public scrutiny of their dogma and bigotry.
Both types of Acme Fem & co. males and females ,,lol
Cool! I’m figuring my next few trips up motorways might be opportunity to add some pictures…
Aimee,
Let your beloved drive and make sure he buys you a couple of pints before you go. Should gurantee lots of opportunities.
I put some stickers up in toilets in October last year – on the back of cubicle doors. The toilet block in question are in a busy area and see hundreds of people enter every day. And guess what- the stickers are still there 4 months later, not one has been removed! Its clearly the best location to place them.
Peter,
Great to hear of your successes.
Its hit and miss with mine staying up or not. I still have fuckwit numero uno mucking about with the ones by the pharmacy; will eventually get a clear picture of him one day just a numbers game, and fuckwit #2 up by the uni well he is not so bold of late but still tears them down.
However some of the ones right across from the criminal courts and by the family courts have been up for quite some time. There are a few old posters still hanging on as well.
I always try and talk to people if they see me posting them. I keep one copy of the Stats-Can flyer with me too, that way I can just point and say see this etc.
That bar graph just screams bigotry when you explain that there are 593 women’s shelters in Canada and not one for men.
Cheers,
Dan
Heck, I like the way this article comes across for its intended audience.
Can AVfM consider making it some sort of permanent feature in a prominent part of the homepage directing new female enquires there simply? (A sort of female ‘read this first’.)
By the way Aimee, what was your thinking in referencing us as MHRM rather than MRM? I’m guessing the obvious, but intrigued to know you precise thoughts.
Archi, see this article, which is also now in our Recommended Reading section:
http://www.avoiceformen.com/mens-rights/activism/entering-a-new-era/
We endorse this change because it helps make clearer exactly what we’re all about. We’ve had decades of people hearing the words “men’s rights” and asserting that this means “women must be subordinate/back in the kitchen/property” nonsense and assuming it means some sort of return to Coverture or whatever. It’s nonsense. This is basic Human Rights advocacy here: a return to the right of Presumption of Innocence, the rights of children to their fathers and vice-versa, the right of reproductive freedom, the right to protection from abuse, and so on.
They’re really rights everybody deserves, but that men are now routinely denied.
Thanks Dean.
As you might guess I’m not a great reader of the many good articles here and rely on my friends at MRA London and others to bring to my attention any article I might read. I don’t mean to appear that I’m not interested; it’s just that I find reading about our issues emotionally difficult and sometimes impossible.
I used to read copious amounts of men’s issues at the beginning of the last decade, but since then my nerves have become too harrowed from my own experiences and previously reading too much about misandry. In fact that’s why I choose the username Trauma Fried Brains on the forum, which indecently I also hardly read or post on.
I hope my lack of current academic involvement in the movement is offset by the physical activism I intend to apply for the cause.
“I don’t mean to appear that I’m not interested; it’s just that I find reading about our issues emotionally difficult and sometimes impossible.
I used to read copious amounts of men’s issues at the beginning of the last decade, but since then my nerves have become too harrowed from my own experiences and previously reading too much about misandry. In fact that’s why I choose the username Trauma Fried Brains…”
The MHRM is an army of walking wounded, our families, friends, and supporters. We’re only recognized by those around us.
Shell shock as well as PTSD from all the shells of gender feminist hate and battery fill our ranks and nobody wants any of that experience, but it’s hard to get away from. It crops up at work, in school, even at church, etc., when we least expect it.
It’s difficult to read about all the bad misandrist stuff, but I’ve found I just can’t get away from it by ignoring it. I think we’re all trying to deal with it as best we can and that’s admirable. No apologies needed. After all, none of us ever asked to have the additional back breaking burden of the gender feminist hate movement strapped on our backs and added to our lives.
I think we’re all doing what we can, and trying to take care of ourselves as best we can and that’s okay. Please continue to do that as best you can. No apologies are needed, IMO. Rebel against male disposability with all your heart, mind, soul, and spirit.
All MHRM advocates, families, friends, deserve as much kindness and consideration as they can find. God knows there’s very little of that in our vile gender feminized, misandrist, Western societies.
Please do take care of yourselves, everyone of you good folks a part of our AVfM community. I do pray for you all to be well and stay well, because I know many have been badly injured by one misandrist law, or misandrist institution, or misandrist policy, or have witnessed loved ones or friends injured thusly.
I though quite hard about it, part of it comes from also seeing the reframing around the word ‘disabled’. I’m currently supporting someone with ADHD fighting to get funded treatment on the NHS, and I’m dead uncomfortable using the label ‘disabled’ in his case (but will do to play the game), because his is a neurological difference and he is ‘able’ in non-typical ways.
I agree. PLEASE make this suggestion a reality, for there is sooooo much truth and power coming out of this unselfish woman.
A woman giving directions (road map) to other women!?!
“Face palm”
Great article. The current state of affairs, when it comes to gender, is one where women are kept in the dark about the other half of society. The powers that be don’t want caring and compassionate women to see what’s really going on. We need women in the MHRM to bridge that gap. Sort of like an ambassador. People who can break all of this down and forward it to women in a way that women will understand. Aimee, honeybadgers such as yourself, play a very important part in illuminating the truth for the half that has been treated like pawns and mushrooms. Thank you.
Im mailing the sammich back. I told you no mayo damnit.
Ah, I knew I had mixed up the sammichs order…can you post it to Dr F, I am sure it’s still edible
Well done, yet again, Aimee. Thank you.
Don’t forget the heart of the “Not all women are like that” argument! A lot of women don’t know any women like the ones talked about here (or don’t think they do). They lie to each other just as much about their reasons for divorces and breakups as they do to everyone else. So, many women hear about their girlfriends divorcing or breaking up and maybe all they hear is that he was “emotionally abusive” and they take their friend at her word. They imagine a man constantly yelling or name calling. Or there’s very little divorce in their family and so they just don’t know firsthand of any situations like the ones they talk about here. So, in their experience, it’s really true that “not all women are like that” and so it makes it that much harder to accept the truths spoken here. They’ll acknowledge that there’s a few really mean b*tches out there, but they don’t think it’s true for most women. And they brush off feminists as a crazy sidegroup. That’s how my best friend is. She just kind of nods her head when I say certain things need to change, but she’d never do anything about it because it’s not a real problem, in her experience. The funny thing is, she agrees with me on everything except the legal out for men in an unexpected pregnancy. She subscribes hard to the “what about the children?” side of it.
I have also discussed these issues with some normally well-intentioned women who acknowledge them, but they won’t speak up because they want to take advantage of the pro-female social bias.
Man we ought to update Aimee’s article to include that, that’s an incredibly good point.
Agree. How about it, Aimee?
Dean, busy till Saturday but will look @ it then – totally agree
Thanks Wendy!
Yes. Important to add, I think.
I remember the last time I head a woman say she was divorce because she had been in an “abusive” marriage. I have no idea of what she was trying to communicate other than that the other party was, in her version, solely at fault, even though she barely said anything. “Abuse” is now an empty cypher, a trigger word that evokes a programmed ideological position and an emotional response but describes nothing specific in type, intention or degree.
I tend to switch off when I hear women using that word. One of my sisters spent years describing her interactions with her ex-husband as bullying. I witnessed some of the things she saw as bullying which was simply her ex-husband acting assertively. It really opened my eyes to how she was using emotional blackmail to try and get her own way.
“I witnessed some of the things she saw as bullying which was simply her ex-husband acting assertively. It really opened my eyes to how she was using emotional blackmail to try and get her own way.”
—How true! …and many women do not even possess the capacity to see how it is the way she/they are acting that is really what is wrong.
I believe it is because the female mind, biased and etched by nature and evolution, is geared to be selfish…for obvious offspring reasons. (Just pure biology ensuring survival BEST.) But in modern times, the beauty here is that, really, NAWALT. Some, like Aimee, and others know how females can be if left unchecked but also realize that it takes two to tango and that the woman CAN’T be right all the time.
I admit it can be very difficult to get people to listen.
http://www.dailylife.com.au/news-and-views/dl-opinion/stopping-violence-against-women-20130213-2ebr1.html
Today I submited comments to this article. Some stories from women about their ordeal to which much sympathy was shown but one man told his story and was immediately shouted down because this was about women ordeals not men how dare he. The author stated only 1% of rape accusations result in a conviction.
I cited studies and stats all of them Government produced. Which clearly outline why her figure is wrong and why many cases do not proceed all valid. The point is they don’t want to listen they don’t want facts. There is a rape culture and how dare I point out the reasons why prosecutions do not proceed or that rape has been decreasing at a rate of 4% a year in Australia. There was a huge problem and I was betraying the cause and encouraging non reporting of rape.
Bit shell shocked but but I will recover and continue to much depends on it. I know that others get it on the chin worse than I but do get some satisfaction in that I do get some support from men and women and the message is getting out there.
Wow, they really were nutty. You crazy, MRA-tendency having nut! LOL I got there too late, but that last comment really needed a reply. She said that the article in question was a lynch mob, which totally took your previous comment out of context. I was instantly looking for the “reply” button, but, alas!, the comments were closed. It’s hard to imagine change when dialogue usually degenerates into that sort of purposeful misreading. :-/
Just the kind of people who deserve no other reply than: “No, no, it has to be 11 in 10!”, when they dish out the 1 in 4 claim.
-And who will most likely agree, without giving it a second thought.
/facedesking.
I am used to it. Have regular stouches with the usual suspects. Tom is the knight in shining armour who is always there regularly puts down any comments that disent from the feminist line. Pretents to be the face of “proper manhood” but like other white knights regularly betrays that reality. Interesting the moderator lets a great majority of my comments through as what I say usually generates a great many replies and builds up the hits.
Excellent article Aimee.
I honestly didn’t think women even liked men much anymore…based on the daily onslaught of hostility that one can’t help but feel.
Does it really take sharing the experience with a man dealing with a recalcitrant EX in the family court system, to see what so many men go through?
There’s got to be a better way.
Perhaps we await the growing “mothers of sons” brigade as a second wave of support and unity.
It’s the apex fallacy at work. They look “up” and see men worthy of attention and/or envy. They look “down” and see things taking up space.
I have never heard of the Apex Fallacy before. You learn something everyday. Thanks!
I may not be using it completely accurately in context. The best example of apex fallacy is “most countries and governments are run by men, therefore men have more power than women.”
I’m sorry but I totally disagree.
The apex fallacy is not the typical logical pattern of women, is the typical attitude of feminists, and there is a huge difference.
Let’s move on; instead of blaming women because many of them seem not to care, why do not we notice that most of men seem not to care?
It is men that have to speak up. If you do not fight for your own sake, none will do it on your behalf.
Women will follow but do not expect them to play the icebreaker role.
I agree but I was replying to a comment discussing women.
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again: men are our biggest obstacle.
Women must speak to other women, who have been trained not to trust men. Older women must also speak to younger men, when there are no Red Pill older men around to do it. We will never lead the movement, and even other men can’t effectively speak on behalf of men who won’t speak for themselves, but we have a duty to step into the leadership vacuum within our own circles, and try to guide future leaders toward *their* futures.
No doubt about it Suzanne, women can and must play an important role.
I have often wondered where the MHRA-women are. Not the ones contributing here, but all the masses out there who are, as Aimee so eloquently wrote, “on the fringe”. We have seen how women can be motivated much easier than men, how they can be excited to action, how they can fight for what is right. So, why aren’t we seeing that same fervor when it comes to men’s issues. Sensible women play a critical role in helping men and boys—which helps everyone ultimately. Bring them on! People out there, link to Aimee’s article as VERY much as you can!
Women who question feminism or who might advocate for men and boys, are just as afraid of being ostracized and cast-out as men.
She’ll be pretty much a social pariah among her circle of family and friends if she’s ever outed. That’s how intrinsic feminist speech control is.
Well said.
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
We are not wondering anything of the sort. We are growing exponentially with both men and women, right here at AVFM. It makes all your other points completely moot.
Speaking only for myself, this is my read on these issues.
1. Men have tried “nice” in the gender wars for decades and it has never, ever worked, not even once. Warren Farrell, formerly an officer of NOW, is the nicest man you will ever meet. When he tried to speak up for men and boys at the University of Toronto for CAFE, feminists rioted. “Nice” is an invitation for feminists to trample you.
Personally, I don’t want to fight a war ever, but MHRAs don’t have a choice. All our attempts at peace and constructive cooperation have been angrily and violently rejected by FEMINISTS.
2. I love CAFE, and we generally support such groups, even if we disagree on the severity of the response. If CAFE and similar groups can build cooperative solutions with feminists, then more power to them, but history teaches that without strong backers like us, nice fails. Always.
3. So, it is fine for feminists to wish androcide on men, but if I suggest that women are preoccupied with shoes, then I’M THE BAD GUY?
4. The only obvious bias is on the feminist side – “boys are stupid, throw rocks at them”. MHRAs attempt to counter that bullshit. Fuck you if you don’t get that.
If you are going to be “nice”, then honestly, you would be dead weight to our side, and I’d rather you join the feminists, because they could sure use some “nice”. Nice is easy.
But if you are tired of playing the perpetual victim, and believe women can handle the responsibilities that come from rights, and think that women can have agency just like men, then prove you are worthy and join the MHRM.
Lots of women aren’t up to this challenge. Is that a girl thing?
“Again, group psychology.”
I beg to differ, and allow me to explain why.
If you had been a frequent visitor on these pages just as I have been for almost 3 years now, you’d be painfully aware of the fact that you in no way can compare the ‘mechanics’ driving the majority of the visitors on this site, with the individuals of the opposition.
There’s several reasons for this, and I’ll try to cover most of them in the following, to the best of my ability.
First of all, the people on this site is a group of hardcore individualists, with a heightened sense of justice and fairness.
I can promise you, that making these people working together towards a common goal is like walking a tightrope over an alligator pit, ’cause every major claim or statement is scrutinized down to the molecular level, and immediately outed if it doesn’t stand the tests.
Also, it is my experience that a small majority of us are simply too old to abide to peer pressure or group psychology, because we’ve proven our worth out in the real world years ago, and quite frankly don’t give a fuck what other people think about us anymore.
Among some of the more prominent life experiences we carry with us is the fact, that the vast majority of us recognize that women are just as capable of doing wrong as men are. That experience has been learned the hard way, in the receiving end of things, and you’ll be hard pressed to find any kind of agreement to this fact from the opposition.
I could easily make the claim that women are even more prone to doing wrongs, considering the ideology driven power they have been given nowadays, and I still wouldn’t be far off base.
Now, let’s take brief look at the opposition that you’d like to compare us with.
In the past two years, what I have witnessed time and again, are groups of supposedly highly educated upper middle class women, portraying all the worst things associated with herd-mentality and group-think, that the human race is capable of.
These are individuals that get their claims of misogyny and patriarchy from rewritten history books, where women are described as perpetual victims of a history that has claimed men’s lives in the 100th of millions, alone in the last century. Men who died to protect these alleged ‘victims’, who has never gone a single day of their lives without food, and has never missed out on anything the industrial world, build and maintained by men, has to offer.
No claims coming out of that camp are investigated further, no allegations too far off, and no statistics questioned, even though even a reasonably sane individual can point to the obvious flaws immediately.
Every kind of dissent or questioning of their entire base of reasoning, when trying to push an obvious hate-ideology, is instantly dismissed as hate-speech, victimblaming, patriarchy, or any other unsubstantiated toxic retort you can possibly think of. And ad hominem attacks are more often the golden rule than not, when those initial claims are debunked.
The main reason I’m describing feminism as a hate-ideology/religion is even more obvious, when you replace the term ‘men’ with any other group of people, regardess of colour, creed or religion.
If you can read this and still not tell the difference between these opposing sides, there’s something seriously wrong with your worldview, and you don’t belong on this site in the first place.
You might want to try out the opposition, and if you want a tip from me, just claim you’re a victim of any perceived wrong caused by men, and they’ll be more than happy to let you in.
You see, taking responsibility for their own lives are another one of the things they oppose, besides MRA’s.
What you have just proved is that in your present frame of mind you are of no use to the Men’s Human Rights Movement, because you completely misunderstand what is going on.
Hopefully it does not take a family member or close friend of yours to get burned by the system before you truly understand.
Keyster I was doing a fair bit of disability advocacy before Beloved came back into my life. My bitterest regret was failing to spot the signs he was experiencing IPV when we first met each other – I lacked the life experience to ‘get’ this could be happening for a man.
This reprioritized my advocacy and I also realised many of the issues I had been dealing with in the disability sector were affecting men more than women.
Sometime you have to fall over the elephant in the room
Aimee – as the only adult I know of who has been diagnosed with ADHD, I thank you for this.
Jinn, I know 3 other men with ADHD diagnoses – two of them over the age of 45 on diagnosis.
I’m neurodiverse myself, so have a bit of a taste of the struggle. Just chatting tonight with one of the guys and thanked him for an organisation tip he had given me – marvellous for the management of ‘scatterbrained’ moments!
“I honestly didn’t think women even liked men much anymore…based on the daily onslaught of hostility that one can’t help but feel.”
Could that be a self-fulfilling gender feminist prophecy in action, i.e., make laws treating men like crap, and spread the gender feminist propaganda that all men are violently flawed, then wait for the alienation of the sexes to increase, then use that alienation to blame men even more for any difficulties in male/female relationships.
It sounds like a self feeding/self perpetuating, gender feminist recipe to poison relationships between men and women.
Gender feminism isn’t an ideology, it’s a pathology.
One of the most valuable things I learned from one of the women here, the laser-insightful Girl Writes What, is that a woman’s primeval worst nightmare is to be *ostracized from the community*, ergo they are, as a group, slaves to Fashion. And, in accordance with the RadFem Plan, the fashion now has become: to despise men – I mean with a scary, palpable *hatred*, these days; to know that any relationship they get into with a man *will fail*; etc.
It’s pretty obvious to me that the RadFem ogresses want the mass of women’s relationships with men to become so poisoned, that the women will start to consider relationships even with these lesbian separatist creeps.
“*ostracized from the community*”
Meh.
The perpetual cycle of animosity that builds between men and women is an unintended and quite welcome consequence of feminism.
Most women find the villianization of men appealing. It gives them a straw man to blame for their own individual failings.
Aimee,
I love this article, but I want to take issue with your use of the word “pacifist” because one of the accusations regularly lobbed at both men and women who support the MRHM is that we advocate violence.
A pacifist will NEVER choose violence. Not ever.
Imagine this scenario, if you will:
Your beloved’s dear ex has decided that YOU are the real problem. She walks into your house with a nice sharp butcher knife and she fully intends to cut your throat.
Her intent is deadly.
There is a loaded gun on the table.
Do you pick it up? Do you shoot her? Do you defend yourself?
If you are a Quaker, who are true pacificts, you would rather die than violate your own principles.
For the rest of us, we may advocate for a policy of non-violence, but not to the point that we are willing to sacrifice our own lives. Or the lives of our children. Or the lives of those we love. Or the lives of innocent strangers.
This has fairly profound implications for men who suffer physical abuse. They are trained from birth to never strike women, to be gender pacifists, and when we throw the word “pacifist” around without truly contemplating what that means, we are inadvertently contributing to the “never hit women” narrative.
One can be vocally and enthusiastically anti-violence without giving up the right to self-defence, or even offense in the face of violence. Those Swedish feminists with baseball bats and ski masks are COUNTING on men to engage their gender pacifism.
I would say we need to remind women that anti-violence does NOT mean free pass to beat the shit out of men.
Some of them WILL fight back.
Just as they should.
JB, us Quakers have a recent saying ‘if you ain’t struggling with the Peace Testimony, you probably don’t understand it.’ Real pacifism is a big ask. I’ve had experience facilitating the Peace 350 workshops (celebrating 350 years of our Peace Testimony) and had Quakers of 50+ years admit their uncertainties given some scenarios.
My own family link to Friends was broken for 2 genarations because my G’father felt WWII was a just war…yet he also chose to be a non-combatant medic.
Were the psycho ex to try something violent I don’t know how I would react – I’m hot tempered. Possibly one reason I am a Quaker – I kind of need the reminders!
I didn’t know you were a Quaker. I’m very familiar with Quakerism as I grew up near a lot of them.
I loved them so much. I regularly asked my best friend’s Quaker grandma to adopt me, as my parents opted for an offshoot of the sect that had no problem with vicious violence against children.
It’s a misnomer, really, to call the sect my parents belonged to an “off-shoot”. That would be like called wine an “off-shoot” of grape jelly. The relationship is fragile at best.
I’m sorry your family of origin didn’t apply ‘that of G-d in all’ to their children. Sometimes (dis)organised religion can fail to protect the vulnerable. It makes me sad and angry to think of it. Beloved’s meeting still routinely enables the psycho…not getting that the tears are just a form of manipulation. He and I have had to make a lot of ‘least bad’ choices during his divorce, which has taken a lot of soul searching.
One thing most people don’t get about our testimonies (though you might having grown up around them), is that unlike creeds, a testimony is an active and dynamic thing and you judge your own intentions and actions in light of testimonies. This might seem like post-modernist relativism, but the additional part is you seek guidance from others over intentions and actions. Your friend’s grandmother would probably have been awesome at discernment and given straight up opinions!
„This might seem like post-modernist relativism,” – Well, it is!
„but the additional part is you seek guidance from others over intentions and actions.” – Plus the collectivist groupthink mantra.
Sorry, the position adopted by JudgyBitch makes more sense in the real life.
@ Lucian, 400 years of practice and we ain’t killed each other off (yet).
To paraphrase one of the old ladies in my home meeting ‘Quakerism isn’t for the faint hearted’ – we’ve got a regular attender in our congregation who is bothered by our corporate (I.e. the national body) supporting gay marriage, but she is conflict averse and won’t discuss it – she gets righteous and upset after the fact. She’s done this as well on local issues, but unless she contributes during the process of discernment, she is going to continue to feel unheard. She’s been encouraged by Elders but to no avail.
The way we work is not for everyone – we are a bit like salt to season a dish, rather than the main course.
Well my layman’s take on Quakerism is that it was on the right track insofar as it recognised that the divine resided within and not without in external buildings or even through 3rd party “agents” likes Popes and clergy hood etc. A testament I understood as a sharing with others the inspiration or clarity they received from their attempts however humble of opening their inner ears and eyes. I like that approach because most if not all of our confusions stem from a lack of inner stillness, peace and clarity in my view
Yep, and they are ramping that up just like everything else too. It used to be “you never hit a woman” Now however, even just taking defensive action like putting your arms up to deflect blows or holding the wrists of a woman who is swinging at you to restrain her from continuing her attack, is seen as violence by the man.
The gutless police support this crap. In the end, they themselves will not be able to arrest a woman for anything, because to put a hand on her will be considered violence.
As soon as I hear a woman crapping out this “never, ever never hit a woman”, I just hear, “I should have the right to beat you to death and you have to stand there and do nothing” and all because she’s having a bad hair day.
Reply to Janet Bloomfield: Excellent point!!
A strong message for women to gain confidence by reading. I’ve highlighted a couple passages I think my physician wife will appreciate. She’s amazing.
I certainly would never “hit on” anybody on AVFM.
I find that a little disturbing but to each his or her own I suppose. I would like to meet Izzey however. I think she’s cool. Oooops. Is that hitting on her? I didn’t mean it that way.
That’s not hitting on her, Scatmaster.
That’s just stating a fact, ’cause Izzey IS cool.
Personally I hope to occupy Dr.T’s couch someday, while she picks my brain apart.
“A shock to the system.” This phrase really does best describe this site.
On my face book page this great article will go, anybody who judges & doesn’t like it they can kiss my black ass, period.
Excellent idea! Facebook pages please!
“It feels pretty crappy to get flamed, but if you can get past the feelings, some of the things said in response to your words will help you see things from different angles.”
I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve said this to women on men’s sites!
Excellent article, Aimee, and timely, at least for me. I’m currently mulling over a post, possibly a video, about some of the emotions involved in the process of ingesting the Red Pill. We are united and moving in a meticulously defined direction, but I for one, must continually remind myself that everything I read, every emotion I feel and perceive in others, is a snapshot of a phenomenon that is extremely dynamic and not at all static. We are all changing and evolving, not at random or with no direction, but changing every day.
> I am not saying women who want to be in STEM fields
> should not have children. What I am saying is we
> need to accept that if they have children their career
> paths are going to be at a slower trajectory than
> when they don’t.
Or have a significant other that is the one staying at home raising the kids and doing the housework; while you work full time.
Do be mindful of your hypergamous instincts and deal with them. If you all of a sudden consider him/her less than what you seem to want, that would be ancient cave-woman (or even earlier) instincts rearing their ugly heads; your significant other is more likely exactly what you wanted the way you wanted it, than not.
Thanks Aimee for the insightful, objective assessment. Well done.
If those stickers are available for purchase, I’ll buy a couple hundred. I know of a LOT of ladies’ rooms stall doors that could use some redecorating…
Sort of funny thinking of a feminist sitting there taking a dump, and our stickers sitting right in front of her at eye level. Hang on……isn’t that…..rape?
This is a very important article. It’s a much needed bridge between the uninitiated mainstream and the truth about misandry. I’ve mentioned before my worry about rational feminists and other reasonable people being turned away due to the site’s aggressive anti-feminism stance, but this article puts it all in proper context and assuages any doubt of misogyny or anti-women’s rights that the visitor might have.
My only concern is the validation of flaming. In my opinion nobody except those who harbor genuine hatred of men are deserving of flaming, and I oppose the practice by any member. The only thing a feminist lie needs to be killed is an clear and rational retort!
I think Aimee used the word “flaming,” because that’s how it is perceived by most modern women, whom she’s trying to reach. Flaming is rare here, but these days logical criticism is politically incorrect, and therefore it’s often interpreted as flaming.
Yep…it’s why I prefer my forums with a large population of men and of women who understand debate.
Sheesh! I once moderated a health forum and the times women threw their toys out of the pram when they were told their advice was unsafe was ridiculous!
“What if my female friends/boss etc find out I am an MHRM supporter?”
You are not an MHRM “supporter” unless they do. At best, you’d be an “agree with-er but not-do-much-about it-er”.
> “I would love to see some AVfM stickers in women’s toilets!”
Way ahead of you. I’ve been strolling in public women’s restrooms for stickerin’ (It’s amazing how little fucks I give these days). Just stick your head in and yell that you are a janitor coming in to clean. If no one answers, start posting.
a few parts of this article look very helpful to any man who may have issues realizing just what is happening, those mostly being the few at the beginning. also, found this article. talks about how mothers who have a favorite child can end up damaging the kids. http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/do-you-have-a-favorite-kid–you-should-read-this-185020308.html#!SomK
Thanks for the post Aimee.
Fantastic Read. Is this in the forums at all??
Nicely handled, Aimee.
Nice work Aimee, I think this may well be a great conduit for many women who are here reading, but are a bit hesitant to speak.
I had to laugh at this one though
“What if I get hit on by one of these guys?”
I would have thought that given the history of most of the men on this site that this would be the safest cyberspace place on earth for a woman.
Anyway, just my humor, in fact I think the article is great.
This is all well and good, but I for one will never enter marriage or a common law arrangement again, until family law/divorce law is completely reformed.
The potential for “bait and switch” is way too high for my liking. Women cannot be trusted when they wield so much power.
No children either. That would likely end in disaster in this day and age.
I’m sorry, but in order for things to change, women need to suffer and they their numbers need to be legion.
Please excuse my typos.
Well it would help if those all too quick to leverage the unfair advantage they have because of their sex would learn to “walk a mile in another man’s shoes” but that would require empathy for the other human being in the equation too. Of course it needs saying that one of the main reasons we face so much injustice as men is other men! Call it vote pandering or just old fashioned male chivalry (institutional and personal) but without so many male lawmakers and politicians eager to give mainstream feminists (whom they take as representing “women”) what they want we wouldn’t be in the situation we are in.
Excellent article Aimee and you eloquently illustrated that “H” in MRHA is no kind of gimmick! We are not seeking separatism but unity by extending equal human rights to both sexes and your article reflects that focus well.
Hello
Well Done!
I think you left out a couple of things though. New girls listen up.
1. Men have time to wait. We know the score. We no longer want / need to be victims. We won’t be. We have a support group (eg AVFM) and we are able to get advice from other men. Victimhood has lost its shaming quality.
2. “Feminists” who want it all – usually have a lot of debt. They do not have time to wait. They really do not have the ability to answer our questions honestly. We find out anyway. Getting one of us to be a “white knight” would be extremely easy compared to tasking us with the label of “sugar daddy.”
3. We share the identity of the victimizers with each other. There are fewer opportunities to run from the light with each new day.
4. The Men’s Human Rights Movement is gaining momentum and memberships. We just made Symantec adopt a public position consistent with having shit themselves during an opera. How long did that take?
5. The laws will change. Abolitionism will be asserted. We will get our families back. ( Or – we will have new families and keep them! )
[ How much of this recession is due to male "grass eating?" What could be done even more quickly if we all became peacefully active grass eaters? ]
6. When we are willing to play with the new girls of today – they will be “mature” and no longer of interest to anyone except their girlfriends. There will always be twenty-somethings looking for a “proper man.”
7. The “bad girls” have really only succeeded in making it very difficult for the “good girls” to be happy with “good men.” Thank one the next time you see her.
Tanks
“What if my female friends/boss etc find out I am an MHRM supporter?”
Female supporters of men’s civil rights face special hostility from gender ideologues. I can understand how women who are sympathetic to equal rights for men and boys would be frightened by this. My response is that a screen-name plus strict adherence to “no personal details” is usually airtight.
Just want to reiterate something profound that you wrote:
“You’ve got to remember, these guys are angry but it is not directed at you personally. Some are pretty pessimistic about women as a whole, and if we respect that their mistrust comes from experience, instead of shaming them for it, we may learn things we need to learn, sometimes painful things but important nonetheless.”
—Some women take things so personally that they just can’t get over and passed “being attacked”. That is something we need to concentrate our efforts to change. Being honest is NOT a personal attack.
—Some women take things so personally that they just can’t get over and passed “being attacked”. That is something we need to concentrate our efforts to change.
Nope not our problem.
Sure, directly, women’s irrational behaviors are not our problem to solve, but indirectly, we should be concerned because such instances, apparently huge in number, do fly in our faces, “making” us deal with it on their terms instead of us concentrating our efforts on the other ways we can oppose. In other words, their irrationality takes up our time when we could be doing other things to help men and boys. Thus, if we can drive such concepts home, we can help rid the situation of interferences, giving us more time to succeed in other ways.
” It’s about the same fundamental rights for everybody. AND THE RESPONSIBILITIES THAT GO WITH THOSE EQUAL RIGHTS”
The second part is vital and a humongous number of people is oblivious of it in this blessed age of entitlements.
A very important post, Ms McGee. This kind of outreach is necessary. I’m not sure if you realise this, but lady lurkers of the purple pill variety are probably more intimidated by the likes of you, Suzanne McCarley and Typhon Blue than anyone else.
Our Honey Badgers are a lot to live up to – and the MHRM is stronger and smarter for it. Keep doing what you’re doing.
I am tough on my own gender. At least in part because I know how terrific women can be if they chose to think for themselves and show their agency. I’ve got lots of terrific role models in my own family, and I’ve always been able to find older women to nurture and mentor me. Even now I have an older woman friend who knows about my MHRA activities and she gives me a space to test some of my ideas in safety.
I’m now getting to an age I am starting to be seen as a role model and I know that the nurturing and mentoring extends from that. But the first step of getting a mentor is ASKING for one. So that’s the first test of agency!
Well put, Aimee. Good article.
Thank you, Aimee. Informative as always. Keep up the great work!
Has AVfM changes its web design? Everything is messed up on my computer.
For instance this article is still the newest article and there are no articles since.
And all the articles are in a vertical list and all the other features are gone.
I have the same problem but I put it down to the fact that I although I am browsing on my desktop computer I am using a usb tether to my 3g smartphone for my internet connection and so am getting served up the mobile (or cell) version of the website. The temporary solution is to scroll right to the bottom of the page and on right hand side of screen you should see some hypertext which says “Turn off Mobile” – click it and you will see the full desktop version with all the latest articles.
The odd thing is that until a few days ago even though I was using desktop computer with usb tether I still got the full desktop version loaded so I suspect the issue is a bug in some recent software update to the site.
For some reason it has gone into mobile mode.
Same thing happens to me on my laptop but not my PC.
It is a pain in the ass but I just scroll to the bottom of the page and click the button to turn it off. Does not mean it won’t happen again if when you close your browser and it clears your cache. As I said a pain but I suspect Alex will fix it at some point.
I beat you to it again lol
Good Article
Why do you keep calling it the “Men’s Human rights Movement”? That annoys me, because it’s the Men’s rights Movement, and who are you to come in here and start trying to change shit? Typical female.
Here’s a concern that was raised:
“Are you trying to turn my husband/son/brother/uncle/boyfriend into a woman hater?”
Here would be my answer in a nutshell – “I encourage men and women to support each other’s men human rights, and I believe both sexes are capable of being strong, independent, and responsible adults.”
So how many types of people are there?
About 7 billion or so.
Yes.
I’d like to add something to the “what if I get hit on by men” category.
Establish clear boundaries. You can even head off uncomfortable situations before they happen by being upfront about not being interested. Just be honest, clear, and respectful.
Most of us are actually quite reasonable about this.