Consumerism Rog

Time for goddess to woman up

Ladies, and yes this one is written directly to women, I have some things to say to you.

But before starting, a preface of sorts. I have to talk about a fundamental problem first. Before we can communicate in way that will work, we first have to figure out a way to overcome a set of social rules that dictate I am not supposed to say things that upset you.

Men are not supposed to upset women. Husbands are not supposed to upset their wives. Politicians try vigilantly not to upset women voters (and even women non-voters).  Advertisers tell you all the time about how much you deserve the best in life, which they are happy to provide.

Most men who are interested in you sexually are telling you what you want to hear all the time, which you know about and enjoy to one degree or another. The men who stay with you end up doing it to keep the peace.

As a man, I am not supposed to write things that upset or offend you, or it makes me a misogynist.

Because of all this and much more, it is a rigged game trying to work with you to solve problems in the first place. The rule is I can’t fix a problem with you because I can’t tell you the truth if it is uncomfortable for you. As long as I remember that, there is no problem.

There’s not one shred of decency or sensibility about this kind of human arrangement, and you certainly must know that on some level.

I know the tone I use to write offends some women into quickly disengaging; women who might otherwise have given the information a second look. It is unfortunate, but the fact remains that the problems I just described are so ingrained, so ensconced in the culture, that the only way I know of to get people to pay attention to this stuff at all is the way I do it.

So, what I have to say is only going to appeal to deeply honest women who make it a habit to put on their big girl panties every day.

And by the way, I say I know what I do works because AVfM attracts support from educated, talented and brilliant women from all over the world. And I would wager my last dollar that all or most of them would tell you that this place is remarkable because it actually is an environment where women are treated as equals. No lip service, just action.

These are women that can hear women (and men) being critiqued, honestly and without sugar coating, and not internalize it, or, as we say in more plain English, make it about them.

I know, that was a lot of words without even getting to the meat of the article, but they might come in useful before this is over.

With that, ladies, what I really have to say to you is that your collective environmental values, the preponderance of what women find important as consumers, is a fucking joke. The overwhelming lot of you seriously need to wake up.

I recently penned an article, “The Earth Mother is One Selfish Bitch,” in which I pointed out a few, very few, ways women’s consumer habits damaged the environment, cause war, animal cruelty, slave labor and displacement.

Comments and emails pointed to other things I left out, like the horrendous polluting impact from make-up production, skin creams made with human foreskins and rampant shopping addiction.

Now I could go into quite a diatribe on those things, but at this point any more proofing of the fact that the modern female psyche is a consumer machine is beating a dead Gucci. And besides, it gets us no closer to calling on women to woman up and start acting like there is an actual living earth outside the walls of the mall, and their romanticized self-delusion that they are, as a class of human beings, ecologically sensitive.

That increased awareness would seem particularly important given that women ultimately control the human impact on the environment.

My research on this subject brought me into contact with something unusual; a feminist that I actually agreed with, and strongly, on a very significant point. Her name is Stacy Malkan, an ecofeminist. She had the following to say, and I cannot fault a word of it.


Women absolutely have the power to control the nature of every consumer product on the market. So how are we going to do that? … We can marshal our power to give the chemical industry, the plastic industry, the beauty industries a make over. And the oil and war industries too. Until there are no more toxic chemicals in babies, until we create new economic systems that are compatible with life.


This is absolutely spot on. There is no exaggeration. It’s actually understated. The truth in that first sentence is devastating and complete. “Women absolutely have the power to control the nature of every consumer product on the market.”

Unless that is a lie, and it clearly isn’t, that means whatever direction we take environmentally is directly in the hands of women.

This economy, this demand driven economy is controlled by women. As a group they possess the awesome power to decide much of what the industrialized world produces, and in what way that is accomplished. But collectively, the only thing they have put on the agenda is an ego feed.

Women do have the power to reshape the economy into one much more compatible with life, and less with war, pollution and human suffering. But even most women claiming environmental consciousness squander that power like trust fund babies while they play with crystals, chant, and then go fully participate in an economic system that is driven by their vanity and impulsive immaturity.

It is a system  that produces many times more damage than it has to.

Some women, the Earth Mother types, also spend time adorning themselves in the patronizing remarks of other, profoundly less rational ecofeminists, like Vandana Shiva, who claims that “women have a special connection to the environment through their daily interactions with it that has been ignored.”

Yeah, so many aspects of women’s lives that have been ignored. That’s the ticket.

I have heard for fucking years how men have messed up the planet on our own, as though the oppression of women was the only thing keeping them from diving on the grenade to save the planet from our vile hands.

Please get out of my face with that Bullshit.

I know men. Most of them are happy with very basic things. Most want a decent, safe home, a nice ride, some electronics, a woman, and hopefully room in one of the closets for their clothes. Everything else is gravy, and most men don’t demand too much gravy out of life.

Women, on the other hand, run through absolutely obscene amounts of money on vanity and hoarding. Many a western man can tell you that he has to fight tooth and nail in his own home for any space to call his own because the placed is jam-packed with inconsequential bullshit that she rarely or never uses. And he will tell you the lack of space does not slow down the shopping.

Oh, and ladies, I know there are exceptions to this, but I think I will concentrate on the rule just a little longer. The reality that comes with that rule is that all that shit, that childish hoarding of meaningless relics from compulsive shopping comes at cost that exceeds what is on the price tag. The world is breathing, eating and drinking and dying in the toxic runoff from all of it.

It is time to check your privilege, women, and start acting responsibly with the power you collectively wield as this species’ primary consumer. Don’t just conveniently ignore the fact that having that power makes this shit your problem to fix.

I have been talking to men for years, encouraging them to stop enabling your incessant need to consume, and to refuse financial responsibility for your consumer habituation. I have told them to boycott diamonds and all other extravagant and vain indulgences of your desire. Some of them have listened to me. But a hell of a lot more of them will listen a lot more closely to you.

Take what Malkan said to heart, and reshape all those industries. Help us clean up the mess we have made tending to you. Learn to live with less. Don’t create a demand that poisons rivers and the air for the frivolity of putting on your morning face.

For pity sake grow up and get over your need to constantly consume.

And finally, for the first time in history, start showing us that feminism is actually producing the kind of women it has always promised; grown-ups that are equal to men and have something positive to give the world. Quit proving how much that feminism has failed at that promise.

Are you woman enough to do it?

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  • Dr. F

    In my feminist days a lifetime ago I attended a pre-meeting for a “Take Back the Night” march.

    There we all were, about twenty of us or so and I was one of two other ignorant male suckers. It was a hot day and we were on the top floor of an large inner city warehouse.

    Our catered lunches sat there in individually wrapped plastic inside little cardboard boxes. Plastic cutlery and paper towels and plastic plates were everywhere. So too were the tins of soda pop, plastic straws and polystyrene boxes with custards and pulped fruit in aluminium trays. I was “blue-cored” then, but this was one moment where the blue shimmer dulled somewhat.

    Something did not seem right because I knew many of these women, and many times they would pontificate and howl at the dreadful ways of males and their raping of their mother earth.

    I would not discard this feminist crap for another six months and the next moment was, regrettably, very memorable.

    When it was time to eat, everyone stood up and leapt at the food table with an athletic talent that would have Aussie football legend Roy Cazaly blush.

    The cartons were clawed open and the plastic cutlery was ripped from their bags with teeth exposed in soft grunts. I am telling you I was so appalled I had to walk to a window and look out while the snuffle-fest reached a hue and cry I won’t forget.

    It was disgusting, but much more so was the fact that not one of these cretins made any reference to the ecological faux pas, or their violation of what they normally hammered on about – men and their raping of Earth.

    I lost three “friends” that day and the beginning of the end was off to a grand start.

  • Tawil

    I used to maintain the property of local woman famed for her ecological awareness and green credentials. She was chief editor of the region’s biggest ecology magazine that covered every topic from how to responsibly discard environmental pollutants to vegetarian diets that were less harmeful to the planet.

    On this woman’s 5 acre property were permaculture gardens for food production, and special mini-environments established for local wildlife and frogs. I had to create and maintain all this very carefully to ensure her green credentials in front of the many visitors who would come along to her weekly “who’s who” parties of the ecology set. I should add that these parties were set near the pool among numerous statues of goddesses and nude female figures carved of stone, and the feasts involved decadence and waste worthy of the top Hollywood parties.

    What confused me is that she never set foot in those gardens and never touched the earth in any way, and yet swooned to her guests about all her favourite projects she had single-handedly established on the property. One day when cleaning out her shed I found a 5 gallon tin of DDT which was leaking, along with a bottle of dieldrin. Concerned about the volatile state of these very nasty chemicals, and mindful of her green credentials, I assumed she must not have known they were in her shed….. “perhaps they were put there by the previous property owner” I mused, “and she does not know about them”. At once I approached her about my toxic find and proceded to inform her of a plan by which we could remove these chemicals safely from her property. To my astonishment she knew the items were there and replied, “No, I don’t want to get rid of them, they might come in handy for something…. just leave them there”.

    They might be useful!!! This was a lightbulb moment for me – I realized that many women who boast about recycling and earth consciousness are simply wearing the mantle like a fake Louis Vuitton dress, designed for nothing more than to afford fake social status. It appears that Demeter today is little more than a DSM narcissist.

  • dhanu

    Forget Paul. Ya know, pig, singing, all that. This will only annoy most of them.

  • Skeptic

    Thanks for this article Paul.
    Another fine, timely, thought provoking piece.
    I agree with all you’re saying here except for one small detail.
    These days I don’t refer to women as “ladies”.
    Because I understand the term denotes gracefulness and being of high rank, therefore a title which I don’t see women collectively deserving.
    It’s an interesting term too. Very similar to the term Lad – meaning young boy, which suggests to me that men (as denoted in linguistics) have a tendency to take responsibility for women and children.
    Children I accept we need to take care of,
    But Lad-ies, not so much.
    It’s time for them to woman up.
    As you point out the environment will benefit greatly from their doing so.
    By environment I include women themselves too.

    This leads me to another thought.
    I have long held the view that capitalism has within it the seeds of it’s own destruction. The Marxist model of dialectics posits that societies have always been in tension between a thesis and antithesis for example Royalists vs Non Feudalists, Capital versus Workers and so on. Taking that model further we may see that the new oppressed ‘proletariat’ is apart from the under-waged workers of the world the very planet itself which can be seen as a kind of exploited class. A class which will inevitably rise up to throw off the chains of oppression NATURALLY – by refusing to nourish people because it’s simply become too toxic to them.
    Now all of that is some pretty standard late teens philosophy, yet here’s my point – As so much of feminism (which boils down to getting more and more stuff for women) drives consumerism there is a NATURAL feedback process which you rightly allude to – pollution and ecological destruction.
    That in turn creates devastating social consequences what with poisoned systems and loss of safe habitat for people and other species alike, and here I join some thoughts I’ve dotted amongst previous threads………

    This is all another reason why I long to see the Non hormonal Male Birth control pill advanced to markets quickly.
    For in addition to ending paternity fraud and reducing abortion markedly which I’ve already written about it means MEN ostensibly then have the power to decide how many people live on planet earth.
    That’s a weighty idea isn’t it?
    I know there are folks including lesbian idealists who pipe dream about parthenogenesis whereby two women’s eggs are fused to procreate, but there’s a significant body (no pun intended) of scientific evidence says that’s impracticable, indeed foolhardy and dangerous as the male sperm’s genetic material provides necessary diversity and protection against diseases which two female eggs fusing simply don’t produce.
    One can take a swipe at dumb-assed feminist bumper sticker hyperbole here and say biologically a woman needs a man like a fish needs WATER.
    No bicycles involved in that equation!
    So we’re back to MEN being needed by women to SEXUALLY produce children.
    So here’s the thing.
    The Men’s Rights Movement in pushing for the right to have the Non hormonal male birth control pill and thus reproductive self determination for men become true eco-warriors that dumbassed ‘ladies’ aren’t women enough presently to handle being.
    They’re too busy slapping on makeup and other complex rigmarole devices in order to be sirens luring men sexually onto the rocks of endlessly more and more production for them to CONSUME.
    As it is if it weren’t for men’s efforts and ingenuity over the ages we’d still be living in grass huts and dying at age thirty with no teeth.
    But enough’s enough women. This is literally FUCKING UNSUSTAINABLE (pun intended).

    Seems to me then that MEN, the inventors of democracy, science, industrialism and all it’s many wonders YET AGAIN have to take the lead in advancing civilization to the next level – environmental sustainability.

    Jeeze, is there any rest for men collectively taking the lead thereby having to be ‘patriarchal’ to pull women out of the primordial slime?

    • Skeptic

      Would the person who downvoted my comment please reply and tell me what they disagree with and why?
      I might learn something useful from them doing so.
      As it is with such a broad commentary on my part I’ve no idea what they disagree with.

      • Paul Elam

        I guess the down vote was the beginning and the end of their intellectual argument.

    • Marcus

      I couldn’t have said it better myself, I never call females ladies, because they’re not even close to being ladies.

  • Otter

    “Skin creams made with human foreskins.”

    I’ll always feel the deepest anger over this one. They’ll cluck and moan over Female Genital Mutilation as they slather their anti-wrinkle cream made from my stolen foreskin all over their faces. It’s like a horror film.

  • BrundleKev

    Good lord it was like watching the Adam West era batman episode. STOP CONSUMING! BAM! GROW UP! BOOM! YOUR VANITY IS MEANINGLESS! ZOOM!

    Good show Mr. Elam

  • OneHundredPercentCotton

    Q: “I know men. Most of them are happy with very basic things.”

    After my father died I realized how true this is.

    This man, who had worked so hard for so many years and endured so much pain, injury and humiliation in his effort to be a good father, left so very few belongings behind.

    His prized ‘coon hound. Some WWII Army Air Corp photos, papers and patches. His Grandfather’s rifle. His Silverado. Some well worn clothes. The graduation ring celebrating his Master’s degree at age 47. The old cow horn he taught me how to blow to call the dogs in from hunting.

    That was it. That was all, besides the generous State retirement pension and medical benefits he only enjoyed four years, while my Mother and her new husband have enjoyed those benefits for over 15 years.

    My husband’s father didn’t even leave a dog behind, just clothes, a few pieces of his WWII Marine uniform, a car and his wedding ring.

    “That’s all she wrote”… as he always said.

    I’ve worked for a large antique store and encounter family members who call, bitterly complaining of the burden of getting rid the accumulated stuff after their parents die. “Get rid of your junk before you die, don’t burden your heirs with having to get rid of it for you” I’ve heard it countless times.

    Sometimes it’s men who collected piles of old motor parts or antique implements and some such stuff, but mostly it’s women with stuff, stuff and more stuff.

    • Marcus

      This reminds me of my Grandma and Grandpa. he has practically nothing, he has his bedroom and a some guns for hunting, and my Grandma has packed the whole house full of bullshit. Don’t get me wrong, I love my Grandma but my God.

  • TPH

    This article reminded me of a news program I saw on the Haiti Earthquake. Donated goods were being offloaded from a ship. There were thousands of shrink wrapped pallets of women’s clothes, used of course and hundreds of pallets of shoes, used high heels and business shoes for women.

    Add to that the 100 or so pallets of cosmetics and hair care products, for Caucasian complexions and hair.

    These donations were sent by women’s charities throughout the United States and Canada.

    The sheer waste was just unmistakeable. How many Haitian women needed a 3 piece pant suit with high heels in a disaster area? Apparently quite a few American and Canadian women thought so.

    Some of the clothes still had the store price tags on them, bought and then donated by a woman who probably visualized herself in a size 6 when she was a size 18.

    No wonder the planet is going to hell. A sizable portion of our populace would rather look nice and go shopping rather than face the reality that rampant consumerism is depleting more than just the earths resources. It’s depleting humanity of any behavior that would benefit future generations.

    What the hell, as long as the girls can buy their Manolo’s and the latest fashions it’s ok, right?

    • TheAmazingAnarchist

      Consumed by consumption!

  • gwallan

    Zimbabwe: Infant Circumcision Could Soon Be Compulsory

    In an interview yesterday, Aids and Tuberculosis Unit national director in the Ministry of Health and Child Welfare Dr Owen Mugurungi said infant circumcision was more sustainable than adult circumcision.

    Of course it is. The infants won’t resist anywhere near as much as the adults might. The devices used to restrain the agonised infants will make somebody a bit of money too.

    Dr Mugurungi said that would translate to about 291 600 male babies who have to be circumcised every year.

    …or maybe lots of money.

    Wonder how many tubs of face cream that translates into?

  • OneHundredPercentCotton

    • OneHundredPercentCotton

      My nephew posted this youtube on Facebook today, and it has me shamefaced.

      At dinner with my husband and two sons recently I was lamenting about how hard it’s been for me to find a new job. Eight of ten businesses I’ve worked at in the last 10 years have gone out of business, and I’m finally realizing the Good Job Fairy no longer loves me and I’m going to have to find a new career field.

      It took me YEARS to finally find something I’m good at, pays well, and is interesting and fulfilling, and now it seems to have vanished with the bad economy.

      My husband and sons were staring at me like I’d sprouted a third eye, forks in mid air…

      “Interesting?” “Fulfilling”? Hey, guys…when did YOU ever looked for a job because it was “interesting and fulfilling”?

      A good laugh all around.

      It’s times like that…you know, when I think I’m empathetic, when I think I’ve come to a better understanding of the lives of the men I love….

      …I get hit with the gaping maw realization that it never even crossed my mind they would rather be doing something else.

      I didn’t have a CLUE…and maybe…I never will…

      • Paul Elam

        Absolutely beautiful.

      • Otter

        They tried to feed us that same lie when we were little boys. “Money isn’t everything. Just do what makes you happy.”

        Right… and end up starving in a cardboard box because no one cares about us.

        • OneHundredPercentCotton

          That was my point. The video spoke to me – I’ve actually experienced it. It might as well have been spoken in Greek to the men in my life – a totally foreign concept.

          I’ve no idea how to make it up to them…

        • 4thtroika

          And don’t forget, they have to approve of what makes you happy.

      • TPH

        A wonderful and direct video. I’m sending the link to my son’s.

      • blueface

        It’s comments like this that make AVfM worth reading.

    • MrWombat

      Sometimes I get frustrated at work, it has its ups and downs. But watching this reminds me that I am living the dream. I do computer work (and not just network support, but developing) for scientists. Actual scientists, working in the biological sciences. Walk past a room, and there’s a dude in there with a serious microscope. All of my users and clients are six times more intelligent than I’ll ever be – it’s been years since I had to explain something to someone stupid. Every day I go for a half-hour walk in a garden, the water dragons, the kangaroos, the tree ferns. I’ve taken to doing it barefoot. If money were no object, I’d do it for free.

      • OneHundredPercentCotton

        I AM doing my old job for free. I volunteer at a non profit twice a week doing what I once was well paid for.

        I work as hard and enthusiastically as I did when I was paid, because I love the work.

        …and yes. They think I’m crazy.

        Hoping it leads to something good, but even if it doesn’t, it’s rewarding.

  • Skeptic

    Yes, Otter.
    That was sort of my response to seeing the video.
    Fine to be doing what you enjoy, but if no-one wants to trade something for what you produce and you want the things other folks produce then you’re screwed –
    there’s a difference between being self centered and idealistic and being pragmatic.

  • TheMoralGodless

    The global elites want to “empower” women because they know the money will be flowing right back into their pockets through consumer spending.

    I don’t have time right now to find the exact statistics, but women have racked up a literally colossal amount of consumer debt compared to men. Also, women do a very poor job of saving and investing when compared to men.

    The cycle goes, 1. reduce male power by redistributing wealth to women. 2. profit from the vast majority of that wealth being spent on consumption 3. tell the women it is the fault of men they don’t have more goodies 4. institute increasingly totalitarian redistribution schemes that benefit women 5. go back to step 1

    And at every step, the plutocrats gain money and power at every transaction.

    Whereas, if non-elite men are allowed to keep their money and power, many of them will multiply it and rise up in the class ranks. And the elites can’t have that, because it challenges their efforts to construct a permanent underclass.

    • OneHundredPercentCotton

      I saw one of those little “meme” joke things picturing Lucy gazing pleadingly at Ricky, arms crossed forbiddingly across his chest with the title reading “Ricky needed to lighten up”.

      Well. Ricky lightened up.

      Mountainous credit card debt, almost non existent savings, foreclosures, an car loads the size of mortgage payments.

      UNHEARD stuff in Ricky Richardo’s Father Knows Beaver Cleaver Best days.

      Lucy sank the ship and screwed the pooch with her scheming and scamming as soon as Ricky “lightened up” and quit “oppressing” her into behaving like a responsible adult.

      America would probably be better off today if it had been I Love Ricky instead of I Love Lucy.

      • TheMoralGodless

        Men know, intuitively, that they are going to be held responsible for their own survival and the survival of others. Hense the propensity to save, live modestly, and when possible, invest for the prospect of a return.

        Women know, intuitively, that they will never be held responsible for their own survival and the survival of others. Hense the propensity for excessive spending, lack of savings, and lack of interest in investing.

        I’m going to be curious if the powers-that-be ever decide to pull the rug out from women to profit from the collapse, just as they have men.

        • OneHundredPercentCotton

          Never say never, but it isn’t going to be any time soon…

          • Otter

            Dude, how would do you think it would pan out if I got 15 different women pregnant, refused to pay child support, and then got on camera and said:

            “Somebody needs to pay for all of my kids and be held accountable. The system has failed me.”

            I wonder if everyone would bend over backwards to make me look like a victim.

          • OneHundredPercentCotton

            Not even if someone robbed a sperm bank and distributed your sperm to total strangers on street corners.

          • Redfield

            Paul this is my first written response on your site … but have been a fan for years, another great article … thank you. I am Australian and our economy seems to be momentarily in better shape than yours. I intend from this point on to support AVfM financially, I know from American friends that folks in your neck of the woods are doing it tough there at the moment!
            Hang in there, we’ll all be in the same predicament soon enough:)
            I do agree with the comments re this video, although I think it ties into another disturbing point with regard to this woman’s husband. As a male in the U.S he currently contributes to 1.6 % of the U.S. male population being incarcerated at this given point in time!! What the reporters don’t seem to have elaborated on, is, was the family welfare dependent before the husband’s incarceration?? Probably, the question remains as to how to teach a person to behave responsibly without letting 15 children starve or be a burden on the dwindling pool of tax payers?? Is it a crime to abandon children in your country?? Does your government bill parents for the care of these children by increasing the tax rate of any future earnings these people may make??

  • TheMoralGodless

    I was once arguing with a Feminist over OKCupid chat about U.S. women’s oppression. I quoted some statistics about female consumer spending compared to men, and said “Women in the US are so oppressed, they are forced to shop until they drop!”

    She was none too pleased with that one.

  • JudgyBitch

    I had to add my own spin to this, Paul. The obvious by-product of giving up on the ridiculous pursuit of consumer spending is that women would have time and space to be at home with their husbands and children again.

    I linked back to your articles, because they are so worth reading.

    • Suz

      That was a good rant, JB. BTW, Futrelle’s Brainless Booblets have discovered your blog. My fault, sorry. (No I’m not!) They think you’re quite the meanie-poopie.

      • JudgyBitch

        Yeah, I saw that. It’s perfectly fine. Those people are in desperate need of a new perspective!

        I like the complaints about how men buy useless things like fishing poles and guitars and motorcycles! Because, you know, food, music and transportation are just so fucking useless! They’re exactly like gel manicures, scented candles and throw cushions!

        It’s pretty funny, really.

        • limeywestlake

          Your blog is priceless, JB. Love it!

    • scatmaster

      Yay, JB is on here. Love her stuff.

    • OneHundredPercentCotton

      Sing it, JB! Exactly the same case I pleaded when I stayed home with my kids from 1979-1996.

      My own mother and mother in law were absolutely The Worst critics. Both ’50’s SAHMs themselves they couldn’t believe I rejected the “liberation” being handed me in favor of HONORING THEM by EMULATING THEM.

      Much as I would like to Thank and Honor my Mother for not kenneling me with strangers, I have never done so. My Mother considered mothering children a drudge and burden and couldn’t understand why I rejected the “freedom” I was offered, instead.

      My Mother In Law was worse. “Why aren’t you HELPING my son? He has to work too hard”. “How does it feel to be a Lady Of Leisure”?

      This “Lady Of Leisure” was too busy rehabbing a two story house by herself after teaching the kids how to call 911 “If Mommy falls off the roof”. I learned how to skim coat, lay tile, change out sinks, toilets and install a shower in a 100 year old house, which netted a $50,000.00 profit I never got credit for because I was presumed “a dull housewife watching soap operas all day”. No more, no less.

      Like my own mother did, I went around in shabby clothes, cut my own hair, sewed my own clothes,and passed on nail polish because 69 cents for such vanity wasn’t in the budget.

      “You are really letting yourself go”.

      Sometimes goaded by guilt and pangs of jealousy at my well dressed counterparts, I would look into daycare options so I could ease my husband’s burden.

      I didn’t have a car, or “good” clothes or shoes for interviews, much less a 5 day work week. The “day care” centers smelled weird, the workers harried, children crying and flinging themselves at the window as Mommies left. “Oh, he always does that” explained one little boy having a particularly hard melt down “he cries all day”.

      All that for or what?

      So people would talk to me at parties?

      Because “Do you want fries with that” qualified you as a much more interesting person to talk to than any home bound dullard.

      I am honored that my own daughter has chosen to mother her own children. I consider it a great compliment that she would. I call her everyday with love and encouragement. I know the isolation she’s going through.

      I suggested a house cleaning service to my son’s fiance, after her tearfully complaining he doesn’t do half the housework after working 8 – 10 hours a day as a car mechanic and working on cars from his garage for extra $ on weekends.

      “Oh, no!” I can’t let STRANGERS clean my house”…but then she already has a “wonderful” daycare picked out for her future kids.

      Letting “strangers” clean her house is completely unacceptable, but letting strangers raise her kids is perfectly fine.

      And yes. I’m a bitch that needs to butt out of my son’s life if I dare point out the irony of it.

      • JudgyBitch

        Well, lady, let me be the first to say you’re absolutely wonderful for doing the right thing by your children, and what a pleasure it must be to see your own daughter give her children the gift she was given.

        I hope my two daughters do the same, and that my son is intelligent enough to marry a woman who won’t let strangers clean their house or raise their children.

        • OneHundredPercentCotton

          I give the credit to my husband. He’s the one who once worked overtime 10 months straight without a day off when his company started incremental pay cuts to 25%.

          He’s the one who got up at 4:00a.m. to scrape snow off the roof in sub zero Minnesota, and came home with his beard and mustache a block of ice from working outdoors 8 hours when the radio announcer adviced keeping pets indoors, it could freeze their eyeballs.

          He’s the one who gave up an idyllic Cali Surfer Guy lifestyle to be the only Dad on the block throwing baseballs to his sons after work or remain calm through our daughter’s teen agnst.

          I can say I did a lot, but he did a lot more.

          We now have three outstandingly wonderful kids and a third grandchild on the way.

          We both tell anyone listening “It was worth it, it was worth it, it was soooooo worth it.”

          It’s the only thing in life I can say was truly worth it.

          • Roguetek

            I am entirely envious of your husband’s good fortune.

            honestly, where did women like you come from?

            Because I totally want to find one. I’m not greedy. Just one…

      • Suz

        “Because “Do you want fries with that” qualified you as a much more interesting person to talk to than any home bound dullard.”

        “Letting “strangers” clean her house is completely unacceptable, but letting strangers raise her kids is perfectly fine.”

        You Go Grrl, er, I mean, Honey Badger!!!!

    • Skeptic

      Oh Delicious!
      Another woman hops the barb wire fence and sneaks past the culture guards to end up at aVfM!
      I’ll open a bottle and pour a glass to that!
      Welcome JudgyBitch.

  • Bombay
  • mongo

    “I know men. Most of them are happy with very basic things. Most want a decent, safe home, a nice ride, some electronics, a woman, and hopefully room in one of the closets for their clothes.

    It’s a strange thing that although the average suburban house must be at least 3 times larger today than it was in the 60s, the space that can be identified with its principal male occupant remains the same: zero. If there is any obvious male space, it is in the garage, or down in the basement. And chances are the only reason he has it is because all those tools have to be kept somewhere, including the human one, and they do have their uses.

    When you consider how the average Western woman divvies up the household resources, it should come as no surprise where her sentiments lie now that she controls national resources as well – you ain’t getting anything sunshine. Doesn’t look like you’re likely to either. Not unless you think prison for not being able to fork it over fast enough is progress.

    No matter what any man says about his wife and the domestic power dynamic, his home speaks louder. If I hear ‘man is captain and woman first officer’ again, I do declare I will laugh loudly in the utterer’s face. And a man’s country is also his home – the same rules apply. Ever since the women of that house took charge, male space has completely disappeared.

    Talk is cheap lads. If you do not have space of your own, you very likely have nothing.

  • Dennis

    According to Warren Farrell’s YouTube video “Five Myths About Men and Male Power”, power isn’t who is spending the most money but rather on whom that money is spent. Seven times as much money is spent on personal items for women than on men. That’s a lot of consumerism and a lot of environmental liability. Its amazing how much pussy groveling men like Gay Hendricks and Arjuna Ardagh will do to perpetrate the lie that somehow women are intrinsically more human than men. I’m sick and disgusted by it too.

  • the Tired Low Social

    could i get some clarification on the infant circumcision deal? i’ve seen on this site and others that every so often the docs fuck it up somehow, but most of those cases the child healed just fine and it was rare that it had life long repercussions, and probably due to some suppression of history, i don’t really find a way to say no to that procedure being performed on males. there are many reasons to say no to the process on females as they tend to be religious and otherwise total bullshit and that has clear proof of what it means over the course of her life, but i have maybe 2 reasons to say no for the males and i would very much like to have more. i feel a search on this topic is very much due for me, but at the time of this comment, i don’t have the time and any other time would probably be during school (i have enough issues there) and i’m not guaranteeing i’ll remember it when i get home tomorrow afternoon. another reason why post-its are so helpful to me when i decide to use them. i’ll finish this as i sense i’m starting to ramble a bit and then put a reminder on the post-its

    • cvar

      Reasons to Circumcise a male infant
      1. Religion/Tradition
      2. Too much of a fuck to clean your son
      3. You think uncircumcised is weird looking

      Those sound pretty bullshit to me. But I guess they need those foreskins for facial creams or something.

    • Marcus

      Are you kidding? There was this one story of a man who had a botched circumcision, they doctors CUT HIS PENIS COMPLETELY OFF, then they decided it would be best to raise him as a girl, after changing his genitalia to that of a female, and then a sadistic psychologist having him and his twin brother have sex so he could “learn” something or other about his place. he eventually committed suicide. I don’t remember his name though, so if anyone else knows I’d appreciate it.

      • the Tired Low Social

        heard about that in psych class. some truly messed up doctors and parents

  • gateman

    “Seven times as much money is spent on personal items for women than on men. ”

    Hang on. So men have to work longer and harder (hence earning 25% more than women), and women spend nearly it all on themselves.

    No wonder every woman I ask if she’d prefer to be a man or a woman says “woman!”.

    Oppressed my ass.

  • Amanda

    Firstly, could you provide evidence that women have a more detrimental impact on the environment than men? As far as I can discover, studies comparing single men to single women find that they either have equal carbon footprints or that the men’s are slightly larger.

    You say:
    ““Women absolutely have the power to control the nature of every consumer product on the market.”

    Unless that is a lie, and it clearly isn’t, that means whatever direction we take environmentally is directly in the hands of women.

    This economy, this demand driven economy is controlled by women. As a group they possess the awesome power to decide much of what the industrialized world produces, and in what way that is accomplished.”

    Your conclusion does not logically follow from Malkan’s quote. Saying, in a quote aimed at motivating women, that women have the power to change something doesn’t imply that men lack the power to change it. The people running the worlds governments have huge power to improve environmental regulation – they are predominantly men. The people running the large corporations have the power to make their products more ethical – they are predominantly men. Men, like women, also have power to change their consumer behavior; for example, you mention that men like ‘a nice ride’, and indeed men currently choose less fuel-efficient cars than women. (

    • Tawil

      @Amanda: “The people running the worlds governments have huge power to improve environmental regulation – they are predominantly men.”

      You don’t honestly think that men in political power are going to make decisions detrimentally affecting the wanton consumerist desires of the women voters who put those same men in power, do you? If yes you clearly don’t understand who has the power. One move by a politician that detracts from narcissistic licence for females gets him voted out – by women. Same holds true for corporation CEOs – any move that would stifle women’s shopping behaviour or her budget would see the company go bust. (and BTW CEOs and politicians make up about one billionth of the total population of men… the rest of the men are laboring in back-breaking, soul-destroying occupations to make your life more comfortable princess).

      Wake up and smell the coffee…. “Who run the world – GIRLS”

      • Tawil

      • Amanda

        “You don’t honestly think that men in political power are going to make decisions detrimentally affecting the wanton consumerist desires of the women voters who put those same men in power, do you? ”

        Well, polls find women more in favor of environmental protection than men, so if the politicians are simply doing what voters want, then lack of environmental action is the fault of more male voters than female voters.

        • Dr. F

          From Wik:

          “However, after 1980 a reversal occurred and a gender gap in voting between men and women has been evident ever since. The range is from a low of 4 points in 1988, to a high of 10 percentage points in 1996.[1] In many countries across the world, women have shown the same pattern as women in the U.S. Recent studies have shown women throughout advanced industrial societies are voting as much as men and with the same voting behaviors as women in the U.S.[2]

          [1] The Developmental Theory of the Gender Gap: Women’s and Men’s Voting Behavior in Global Perspective, Ronald Inglehart and Pippa Norris

          [2] Center for American Women and Politics, Rutgers University, Women’s Vote Watch

          • OneHundredPercentCotton

            Scary thing is – I just saw a list of top countries to be born in, and America went from being #1 in the 80’s to being #17 currently.

            “Cause the world will be a better place if women ran it”

        • Kimski

          Pretending to be in favor of something, and actually doing something to back it up, are two completely different things.

          Also, the majority of voters consists of women, which should take care of your petty little attempt to counter here.

          • Amanda

            So you argue that women pretend to be in favor of environmental issues in polls, but that politicians cleverly see through that ruse and act in the way that they somehow know women secretly want? Interesting theory. Strangely then, female politicians, who you might expect to know the secret wishes of women voters even better than male politicians, have a more environmentally-friendly voting record than male politicians, regardless of political party.

            @Dr F: thankyou for the information on the voting gap. It is worrying that men aren’t exercising their right to vote quite as much as women. Though I imagine you will soon correct me, I don’t understand how it is women’s fault that men are not voting. Surely if men in general care more deeply about environmental issues than women (which I see no evidence for, in fact the reverse) and wish to force politicians to do something, they are free to use their vote to do it?

          • Skeptic

            Besides the fact that it’s overwhelmingly MEN who are inventing, building, testing and refining greener methods for you to still get your air conditioned, cruise controlled, latte fixed, dyed, manicured opinion online there’s another fact which belies your fembotism.
            If USA women – the demographic majority, were so keen as you claim on environmental issues as to be the superior to men earth goddess beings you make them out to be, trust me MALE politicians would be bending over backwards to give them what they wanted. Yesterday.
            But extensive, intensive polling, the religion of politicians, done by both Dems and Reps showed overfuckingwhelmingly that THE issue USA voters were concerned about during the election was the economy.
            Not water quality.
            Not frog habitats.
            Not native forests or butterflies and salmon numbers.
            But dollars for spending in more malls and highways, supermarkets and clubs.

            I watched BOTH presidential debates end to end with rapt attention, and I read dozens of news reports from both Obama and Romney, and not once did either go into detail about environmental issues like clean air, recycling schemes, recovered wildlife and such.
            Not once.
            THE major concern was how to go on having affluence and growing the economy was top of the list on that agenda.
            EVERYTHING else palled into lesser significance. Period.
            So please go away and stop blowing arrogant defensive gynocentric smoke out of your ass.

          • OneHundredPercentCotton

            Women “support” the envirnment for the same reason they wear non-prescription glasses –

            They think it makes them look good even though it’s fake.

          • Amanda

            @ Skeptic: I have not argued that US women are wonderful protectors of the environment. I’m well aware that the US has one of the highest per capita carbon footprints in the world. But women’s environmental record is on average no worse, and arguably slightly better, than men’s.

          • Skeptic

            You’ve obviously never heard of pollution by proxy have you? Probably too busy shopping I guess.

          • Suz

            ” they somehow know women secretly want?”

            What’s “secret” about what women want? Women speak volumes about “what they want” every time they whip out their Visa Cards.

          • Kimski


            Please point me to the place where I say that it’s women who are to blame for men not voting?

            It’s the politicians that women vote for that are the reason men are not voting anymore. There’s no point in it, when a larger group of voters unanimously decides who gets into office, based on how ‘hot’ they are or which tie they wear, while completely disregarding their qualifications.

            And, no, I don’t argue that politicians cleverly see anything, beyond the next hook-up line to a majority of women, in order to get their vote. Again you’re basing your counter on assumptions and projections, while putting words in my mouth.

            I do however claim that women vote for politicians that doesn’t follow through on any of their promises, especially when it comes to environmental issues, which most men seem quite aware of, judging by their consistent lack of voting for anyone that runs for office. And I most certainly don’t see any female voters holding their prize bulls to any of their promises.

            If you can’t be honest in a discussion, I’m done talking to you.

          • Kimski

            “Strangely then, female politicians, who you might expect to know the secret wishes of women voters even better than male politicians “.

            Judging by the way that most women wouldn’t dream of voting for a female politician, and quite literally despises working under a female boss, that assumption won’t even buy you a white chicken feather for you hat.

            It goes hand in hand with the other female myth, that women don’t lie to eachother, ‘because we can sense such a thing’.

            Don’t you think it’s a funny thing then, that ‘Hilarious’ Clinton, who claimed that women are the real victims of war, consistently votes for sending their husbands and sons into wars in the deserts down south?

            You need to wake up.
            You’ve been lied to all your life.

        • Tawil

          @Amanda: “Well, polls find women more in favor of environmental protection than men”

          Paying lip-service to environmental protection vs actually doing something helpful for the environment are two different things….. things that usually clash in the minds of women when walking past a shoe, bling or clothing shop. In the latter situation environmental protection comes off a consistent second best and the message to politicians is, “Yes we want you to protect the environment, but if you let that protection take precedence over our shopping and polluting experience we will vote you out of office”.

          Barby has priorities and the politicians are forced to abide by them.

        • Marcus

          interesting that you talk about female vote statistics, when you yourself didn’t vote, out of pure apathy, considering your “political aspirations” how you didn’t give a shit because you’re “Moving to Canada” While I waited in for 2.5 hours to vote.

      • Ray

        “@Amanda: “The people running the worlds governments have huge power to improve environmental regulation – they are predominantly men.”

        HA, a lie and sheer hypocrisy! The most influential country in the history of the world is run by men ELECTED (predominately) BY WOMEN who just happen to be the MAJORITY of the electorate. …so why don’t American women just go out and elect 100% women and take over the most powerful nation on earth. Hmmmmm?

        Maureen Dowd of the N.Y. Times has written about that peculiarity of women known as “opting out.” It’s used when things get toooo difficult.

        Clearly, in politics as in many, many other areas, and as shown by the example above, most women “opt out,” so they can continue to blame and shame men for ALL problems, rather than taking responsibility and doing the hard, dirty work and heavy lifting. It’s just the long established modus operandi of the ?fairer? sex.

    • Dr. F


      The “study” you wave about here like a kid flapping a wet Polaroid is flawed.

      The study does not mention how women buying cars and vanity items and so on, are bought using the husband’s credit card.

      Those numbers (carbon footprint) will be attributed to the one who holds the plastic card. Get it?

      How the hell can you not see this? You are either ignorant, stupid or a fibber and I do not think you are the first two.

      Also, the article here is a call to women from a grass-roots level whereby the individual is cleaning up her corner of the world, or being accountable from the instigating node – the consumer. You pointing to the big bad men with their suits and limos is wracked with a dishonesty designed to deflect and refocus.

      In other words, a CEO of a company selling make-up will never shut down production because of an ecological light bulb moment – only the consumer can. So your (fibbing) assertion of big bad men in their fancy suits buggering up the environment is an organically processed steaming pile of monkey dung.

      The next lie you have made is your telling us of the attitudes of women compared to men with their sensitivity regarding the environment. It’s another lie because you know, as we all do, that the actual purchases (the behaviour) makes the mark on the planet, not the attitude. Yet you present this as an indication of how the article here has somehow diminished with its integrity. Why else would you present that point Amanda?

      I’m sorry, your response has come from a visceral level, and as such does not always adhere to the truth, and in this instance most definitely not.


      • Amanda

        “The study does not mention how women buying cars and vanity items and so on, are bought using the husband’s credit card.

        Those numbers (carbon footprint) will be attributed to the one who holds the plastic card. Get it?”
        Which study are you referring to? The first ones I discussed, which found that men had an equal or higher carbon footprint, compared single men to single women, for the specific reason that men’s and women’s behavior within a relationship may be influenced by the other’s choices.

        If you mean the second study I discussed then yes it compared retail sales to men against retail sales to women. Perhaps as you say, in some cases, a women researched and chose a sports car or SUV for herself but the purchaser was registered as her husband. So why not look at who is making the dealer enquiries for which cars on a dealer’s website: “For each car, CarGurus says it calculated the percentage of dealer inquiries that were made by males versus females and then ranked cars with the highest percentage of dealer inquiries from a given gender.” They found: “Men favor fast, powerful sports cars and burly pickup trucks. Women generally stick with practical cars and economy- and mid-range-priced crossovers.” Perhaps you will argue that women are forcing men to research and purchase fuel inefficient cars for them (which begs the question of what cars men are driving, if their car purchases are predominantly gifts for women). If you can provide research to show that the purchase of fuel-inefficient cars is primarily womens’ fault, I will be very interested to read it.

        • Dr. F

          And I’ll be interested in reading from you how concentrating on one product only, makes a break or make case against the article here.

          While you’re at it, you can throw in other variables associated with that one product, like driving patterns, kilometres accrued, length of average trip, frequency of replacement of vehicle, average number of passengers per trip and kilometre, frequency of service and other products associated with the one product you’re talking about.

          You are looking at a tiny brushstroke on a small square of a very large painting and are presenting it as the template for all there is to see.

          I’ll address anything you put here, but I won’t unless you begin a dialogue of logic and intellectual honesty.

          • Amanda

            Well, if we want to look at all the variables together, how about addressing the studies of total carbon footprint that I first mentioned, which cover both direct and indirect energy use. Those represent the large painting, and find slightly higher impact (statistically significant in some cases, not significant in other cases) by men. (Here’s the full report, – you have to scroll down a couple of pages to get past the bit in Swedish)

            If you consider landfill, pollution and so on to be more important than climate change, then we need other studies that compare totals for men and women; I haven’t found any so far. I’m genuinely interested in what the results would be. There’s a lot to consider – how would the pollution from the ores used in gadgets compare with the pollution from moisturising cream, which gender recycles more, and so on?

          • Skeptic

            Oh Jeeze Amanda,
            you expect us MRA to be sucked in by a ‘report’ from probably the most misandric culture on the entire planet – Sweden. A place that’s so PC – pathetically correct they have friggin quotas for wimmin on boards.
            C’mon sweetie, you are way, way, way, underestimating our intelligence and global reach.
            We’ve got these things Men invented called smartphones these days, so we got the lowdown on Sweden a while back.
            And don’t worry next year, and every year thereafter MEN will be producing smartphones for us all which will have a smaller carbon footprint than last year.
            Are you getting any clearer?
            Or do you want to carry on throwing Troll shit at men?

        • pjanus

          The She Economy

          “Over the next decade, women will control two thirds of consumer wealth in the United States and be the beneficiaries of the largest transference of wealth in our country’s history. Estimates range from $12 to $40 trillion. Many Boomer women will experience a double inheritance windfall, from both parents and husband. The Boomer woman is a consumer that luxury brands want to resonate with. – Claire Behar, Senior Partner and Director, New Business Development, Fleishman-Hillard New York”

          Women account for 85% of all consumer purchases including everything from autos to health care:
          91% of New Homes
          66% PCs
          92% Vacations
          80% Healthcare
          65% New Cars
          89% Bank Accounts
          93% Food
          93 % OTC PharmaceuticalsAmerican women spend about $5 trillion annually…
          Over half the U.S. GDP

    • OneHundredPercentCotton

      Go to any parking lot in America and note which sex is mostly driving the SUVs.

    • Skeptic

      Here’s something especially for you Amanda.
      You can put it on a shocking pink iPad ‘purchased’ with a slice of sparkly Bank of America plastic too if you fancy.
      Don’t even need to get off your ass to do so.
      You can do it at home whilst still wearing PJs and slippers online!
      Isn’t life an absolutely faaaaaaaabulous breeze daaaaaaaaarling?
      Go ahead Grrrrl!
      Blow up that bubble on the edge of the financial cliff a bit more.
      The Western corporate financiers and factory owners in China will look the other way as the rivers and air there get poisoned.
      Another day, another dammed river.
      Or should that read damned river?
      Oh well, whatever.
      It doesn’t matter sweetie.
      You know what I mean because women are sooooooo smart.
      You just go ahead and listen to the nice tune anyway.
      Never mind these nasty icky pollutey men.
      Now why don’t you run along to someplace where you can get guys to cut your entertainment costs also by waving eye candy under their noses – many of the less clued up ones will still buy you meals and drinks!

      • OneHundredPercentCotton

        I was just going to post that!

      • Kimski

        I fucking hate that song, along with the “artist”. The only time I’ve ever actually wanted to be a female, was when she proved how easy it is to fuck your way to the top, without having a grain of knowledge about what you’re doing. Dress like a slut, do a little dancing, and you’re a musician.


        Talk about lowest possible denominator in both music, performance and personality.

    • Paul Elam


      Your comment alone is polluting. It is feminism’s toxic waste that has already contaminated much of the planet’s intellectual purity. So while I will answer you, I do so with the qualification that along the lines of environmentally sound thought, it is like talking to a BP rep about good saltwater fishing.

      As to why women cause more pollution I will have to tax your ideological mind with simple math.

      Men earn about 80% of income worldwide. Women spend about 80% of income worldwide, a disproportionate amount of it on themselves.

      If you look into an average shopping mall, you will find that over 80% of the retail space it targeted at women, because that is what works.

      Consumption is generally a good thing, because it drives economies. It also drives pollution and other negative things. All those goods, shoes, clothing, cosmetics, bobbles, beads, stuffed animals, pink thongs, jewelry, etc. have to be manufactured and shipped all over the world. Manufacturing and shipping causes all the pollution.

      The resources to manufacture and ship also cause a lot of other things, like war, slavery, displacement, etc.

      Gee, am I having to write the article again?

      It is real simple, cupcake. Those who consume, pollute. Those who consume excessively pollute more.

      Rinse and repeat till you figure out who consumes more, and who consumes more frivolous goods and services in the vanity economy.

      BTW, producing Swedish research around here is like breaking wind and calling it perfume. More pollution.

      And go back and read Malkan’s quote till you understand it. She targeted women as the ones with the power to change things because she recognized that they have that power more than men do. It could not be more obvious. She was challenging women because it is women that have the control over the purse strings.

      If you are too obtuse to get that simple premise, that is fine. Not everyone is gifted. She got it. I get it. You are in the minority here because you can’t add 2 and 2 and come up with 4.

      • Amanda

        Thankyou for your reply.

        “Women spend about 80% of income worldwide, a disproportionate amount of it on themselves.”

        Would you be kind enough to provide a reference for this claim, including the second part? I have not been able to corroborate it.

        In a society where women tend to do a disproportionate share of housework, including the family shop, it follows that they will make more purchases, but the consumption of the purchases will be shared by the couple or family. So to show whether “women cause more pollution”, we need evidence on whether that women actually consume more fuel and produce within the family than men do, or we need to compare single men with single women. If you refuse to discuss the research I presented, which includes studies from Germany, Norway, Sweden and Greece (aren’t you tempted to reveal actual flaws in it, if it’s as awful as you suggest?), please could you link to some alternative comparative research from a more acceptable country? So far no one has provided any evidence for the claim that women have a higher environmental impact than men.

        • mongo

          “Women spend about 80% of income worldwide, a disproportionate amount of it on themselves.”

          Would you be kind enough to provide a reference for this claim, including the second part? I have not been able to corroborate it.

          This is boiler-plate Feministese for “ok you got me” (there is no such equivalent to the frank admission in that language).

          After many years of studying the language, it is nevertheless possible to identify a basic structure. One of the essential features is that where a modern language would offer something directly appealing to reason, and usually the matter at hand, Feministese features statements that make no obvious sense, though are often grammatically correct. A great example is “let’s be friends’, which is actually a favored way of saying “Let’s stop seeing each other”.

          “Citation please” – and its variants such as Amanda’s example – is another very common idiom. Amanda’s use is an excellent specimen. Here she is seemingly asking for scholastic evidence of that which she can verify with her very own eyes, in every town and city of the Western world. But of course, the trick lies in knowing that she is asking for no such thing.

          • Kimski

            I agree.
            In this case there seems to be an ability to read the words and see the signs, but there’s no reflection or comprehension beyond registering, only blissfull denial.

            You could easily compare it with being colourblind. You’re told that there’s colours in the picture you’re looking at, but are unable to see beyond shades of grey, black and white.

            I wonder if the former victims of russian brainwashing experiments shows similar signs of dysfunctional comprehension abilities?

        • Paul Elam

          Amanda, sorry, but I am not here to do the whack-a-mole waltz with you.

          Asking me for evidence that the sky is blue on a nice day, or that more men than women are interested in professional football is about the same as asking me to prove that women drive consumer culture. Turn on your TV and watch a few commercials, visit a mall, or better yet, read the words of the noted ecofeminist whose words were the centerpiece of the article you are responding to:

          Women absolutely have the power to control the nature of every consumer product on the market.

          Please track her down and demand proof. Cite a Swedish study or two for her that hint that up is down and round is square, if only you cherry pick enough of the right information.

          Alright, tell you what. I will go ahead and provide you something to ignore. It took me all of about 5 seconds to pull it up on Google.

          Note the reference to women in the US controlling 80% of all consumer spending, and women worldwide at 65%.

          Now, I am really done here. This is not going to go anywhere. You aren’t listening to the OP, to the feminist source it quoted and instead you are just opting to obfuscate your way around the stupidly obvious fact that women control consumer spending and that consumerism is driving a lot of bad shit.

          If you can’t even be that honest, I’ve no fucking use for you.

        • Ray

          “Would you be kind enough to provide a reference for this claim, including the second part? I have not been able to corroborate it.”

          Go to the “Mission” pull down on this page.

          Go to “Facts.”

          There you’ll find a sentence that says, “Women make 88 percent of all U.S. retail purchases.” I don’t know what it is world wide.

          Pocketbook Power: How to Reach the Hearts and Minds of Today’s Most Coveted Consumer – Women
          Bernice Kanner

          “women tend to do a disproportionate share of housework”

          That’s ludicrous, when you consider that shingling a roof, mowing a lawn, snaking a drain, raking leaves, concrete work, painting, etc. is also “housework.”

          • Skeptic

            “That’s ludicrous, when you consider that shingling a roof, mowing a lawn, snaking a drain, raking leaves, concrete work, painting, etc. is also “housework.”

            All True.
            But you forgot to add something to that list of housework that many men do – listening endlessly to mindless impulsive pressure to consume.

          • Astrokid

            That’s ludicrous, when you consider that shingling a roof, mowing a lawn, snaking a drain, raking leaves, concrete work, painting, etc. is also “housework.”

            I partly realized what a raw deal home ownership is for the man.. when I saw my neighbor regularly take care of ALL the above jobs.. shovel the snow, and then clear the snow off his car, the family car, his wife’s car and his grown-ass daughter’s car. And lets not forget that some of these jobs can be dangerous and accidents can result in broken bones, torn ligaments (I know all abut them, sigh!). I wondered why my neighbor got into such a deal.. in addition to regular male disposability, he has a physical condition.. he is a hunchback. I suspect that he considered himself very lucky to have even found a woman, and so is paying for pussy-benevolence ever since.

        • Astrokid

          In a society where women tend to do a disproportionate share of housework, including the family shop, it follows that they will make more purchases, but the consumption of the purchases will be shared by the couple or family

          I have heard a so-called “bidirectional feminist”.. who aparently appreciates and agrees with Warren Farrell’s works.. say the same thing. In fact, she went further and said “You know how some unidirectional feminists wrongly claim that men are in power, and so all decisions they take are for benefit of men alone (i.e frontman fallacy). Well.. consumer spending is the same. Even though women do 80% of the spending, its for the benefit of both the sexes“. LOL. rationalization hamster.

        • cvar

          “In a society where women tend to do a disproportionate share of housework”

          Stay at home dad here. Housework is literally nothing. It’s like complaining that you didn’t shit in your bed this morning. Oh man, I’ve gotta watch TV in this nice clean living room. Fucking oppression right here. Today, I walked across the house and didn’t step on a single Lego, fucking patriarchy. This is bare minimum, I’m an adult now, type shit. I can’t believe women ever complained about it. I thought I was missing something, but nope. Women have been complaining about keeping their living areas tidy.

          Of course, you’re not actually talking about all the housework. Since that would actually be divided up, with the men doing the difficult and dangerous jobs: cleaning gutters, mowing the acres of land and otherwise maintaining the yard, fixing cars, replacing that one fucking light bulb that’s 20′ up in the stairwell, stopping leaks in the plumbing. You know, the REST of the housework.

          I can only provide anecdotal evidence about women and their environmental impact, which is fairly worthless, but we can do some critical thinking exercises for a moment!

          How many bottles of assorted bath and body crap do you have in your bathroom? I’d be willing to guess 4, though I’ve seen 6+. Most guys will have 1 or 2 if they use gel soap or somewhat. We’ll throw in shaving cream as a freebie and call it 2 overall to account for guys that use bar soap and guys that don’t shave(or dry shave).
          How many guys do you know that blow dry their hair?
          Wear makeup?
          Have more than 4 pairs of shoes?
          Wear more than 3 pieces of jewelry?
          How many distinct outfits do you own?

          How do you possibly arrive at the conclusion that men have a similar or larger impact than women? Are you just foisting off all the manufacturing that goes into meeting the demands of female consumption onto men, who necessarily work the “icky, dangerous” jobs?

          Your study shows that men spend more on transportation and eating out, while women spend more on household items and eating in(men spend a lot on meat, but women spend even more on fruits and veggies), that overall, the differences are negligible (and in 3 of the 4 countries, within the margin of error). Given what we know about dating culture and the incredibly close results posted by a SWEDISH report, a country that once attempted to shame swedes for being attracted to other swedes in the name of politically correct diversity, the fact that gas prices in Greece are through the roof (hell most of Europe really) we wind up with very little actually said with a lot of blame being foisted onto men, despite little evidence to show anything of import.

          I suppose you’d know that if you’d read past the summary though.
          (I’ve got a lot of free time on my hands since all that oppressive housework takes up soooo much time, so I actually read your report! The worst enemy of a feminist, somebody fact checking! I’ll admit, I did stop reading once I realized that the data presented in the paper didn’t support YOUR conclusion, or the paper’s. Awkward.)

    • Marcus

      As SOON as I read the first line I knew it was my sister. Gentlemen, meet my feminist twin.

      • Kimski

        My deep felt condolences for your loss of your twin to a bogus ideology.

        • Marcus

          Thanks man, it truly has been a pain, I was always shy and she used to be one of my only friends.

    • Free Human Being

      Hi Amanda.

      Do me a favor and walk into a mall. That’s all, just walk on into any mall in the western world and then come back and comment.

      Seriously. Walk in and look around, with your eyes, in the mall. The overwhelming majority of stuff located therein is designed, made and marketed to…

      Just go into a mall and come back from the mall and tell me about the mall.



      The mere fact that people will argue against female based consumerism is such and affront to logic and an aversion to reality that one might wonder if Amanda and her ilk have actually been to a mall.

      Can I get the word mall in one more time, for Amanda?

      Am I the only one seeing the irony that you can’t spell Amanda without the word man.

      A Man Da.

      That’s gotta hurt.


  • Booyah

    Oh….. I feel a bit faint. There was hardly any swearing in this article. I think I’m in shock. Can someone please go to the chemist and get a hot pack, a cold pack, sedatives, painkillers and an electrolyte drink? Oh don’t forget the herbal remedy.

  • Tawil

    • Booyah

      Yep. I’d hand over fistfuls of cash if that voice went to the shop and I didn’t have to hear it anymore. 😛

  • http://none universe

    One great tell-it-like-it-is essay. It’d be an overwhelming understatement to say we need more of the likes of such as this.

    Regarding that one isolated ‘eco-feminist’ comment.
    She may be correct intimating the poisoned earth resulting from the quick bucksterism industrial economy. One need not be an environmentalist or a feminist to figure that one out.

    However, with the track record of feminist conceit, oblivious to so many things outside their own limited understanding, I’m more wary of the toxicities eminating from their minds and mouths.
    Without knowing in what context Malkin referred to women as having the power to “control the nature of every consumer product on the market” – it’s doubtful she is even aware of the dominant female consumptiveness that corrupts both the planet and human species – I’d be willing to guess that “We can marshal our power to give the chemical industry, the plastic industry, the beauty industries a make over” really means more of the same social/legal fascism we’ve seen from other ‘gender’ ideologues.

    Well, maybe these idiots could be usefull afterall in changing yet another monolith to suit only themselves. They’ve already proven themselves an unwitting ally to the banking industry. You know, the more white-knight government funded female exclusive programs the more multi-generational indebtedness to world banks.

    Unaware of their own solipsism feminists and women the world over have already greatly participated in leading nations and economies near the fiscal and environmental cliff. Too bad some just won’t take a jump off.

  • Ray

    I’ve worked some dirty assignments in my time that might inspire Mike Rowe of “Dirty Jobs” to do a show on a few.

    But getting to Paul’s article, once when pumping out a sub grade sewage pit for a big two story building, I saw about twenty tampons about to get sucked up in the 4″ hose for the vacuum (pumper) truck. I had my camera halfway out, when I heard a giant WOOOSH, and saw the eco-unfriendly tampons disappear up the hose and into the truck.

    Tampons have long been a major problems to Plumbers (an almost all male profession). It seems that even when disposal bags and special containers are provided in restrooms, the women just flush them down the toilet. I once had one of my Plumbers come to me in frustration, because the big boss had chewed him out, saying he wasn’t doing his job and telling him, “You were told to clear that line yesterday and now it’s stopped up again. You’re not doing your job.” I diplomatically explained the situation to the big boss, but what I really wanted to say was, “Yea, dumb @$$ big boss, the women in that building are just that irresponsible and unaccountable that they plug the dang commode every day with their sanitary napkins.”

    I wonder how many trillion of those eco-unfriendly, non-biodegradable tampons have wound up in sewage treatment plants, causing problems in pumps and other sewage disposal appurtenances?

    • Suz

      Red mice?

    • Aimee McGee

      I’m going to give one word here and let people google it if they are curious


  • Ray

    “’Women absolutely have the power to control the nature of every consumer product on the market.’

    Unless that is a lie, and it clearly isn’t, that means whatever direction we take environmentally is directly in the hands of women.”

    Absolutely 100% true!

    From the book “Pocketbook Power: How to Reach the Hearts and Minds of Today’s Most Coveted Consumer – Women” by Bernice Kanner,

    “Women make 88 percent of all U.S. retail purchases.”

  • Aimee McGee

    OT: just had to do my online Equality and Diversity training today. Still pissed off about the crapolla about the ‘pay gap’ in it…but I got 100% by chosing the answer that was the biggest lie B)

    • scatmaster

      I skipped out on my training years ago.
      They chased and chased me but never got me.
      Is that attempted rape?

    • Otter

      Years ago I went to a college in which white people were the minority and a group of us went to this other college for a diversity seminar to get some extra credit.

      While there the women running the seminar made a list of what diversity meant. Basically that list was just designed to exclude people like me (female, ethnicity other than Caucasian, religion other than Christian, sexual orientation other than heterosexual, so on and so forth.)

      As luck would have it I was the only white kid sitting with my asian, latin, and black buddies. I raised my hand and started to explain to these idiot women what the word “diversity” means. I explained that diversity includes EVERYONE, not just those groups of people who they decided are “more diverse.”

      Without skipping a beat they said something to the effect of “that’s a really interesting idea” and moved on with their ridiculously pandering “diversity” seminar, visibly shaken I might add.

      • Kimski

        Sounds like a bunch of fucking closet racists to me.

        • Dr. F


          We get those fucking closet racists here in Australia too.

          They are really tiny and you can open up a fridge or an empty carton and there they are, bonking. That’s right, they’re ridiculously horny, and all they seem to do is be going at it non stop from dusk to dawn.

          Why just this very morning I opened up my socks drawer and lo-and-behold. What do I see, but a great mass of them writhing about all over themselves in a kind of slap happy flesh festival of unfettered and quite wanton lust.

          Just before I shut the draw to let them be, I heard one of them (the ring master with a wee megaphone) squeak up at me.

          “Get lost you repugnant pale faced Anglo Saxon middle-class blue-eyed Cuak!”

          • Kimski

            Exterminator (plural exterminators)

            1.Someone or something that exterminates.

            2.Specifically, a person whose job it is to kill insects and other pests in buildings, closets or sock drawers.

    • TigerMan

      This kind of crap so thoroughly lodged within our establishments is certainly not from the “nice” form of feminism but direct from casting central at the nasty genderradical spectrum. It is like dry rot in timber – you don’t see much that’s bad from the outside often until it’s too late and the structure collapses that it infested and grew within.
      Glad you passed though – it’s good to have sane people working and not excluded by this crap. :)

  • Codebuster

    Well, polls find women more in favor of environmental protection than men

    As others have pointed out, having warm, fuzzy opinions about things doesn’t count. Women have lots of warm fuzzy feelings towards motherhood, for example, yet it is now well established that the primary perpetrators of child abuse are women. And lots of little boys imagine themselves becoming astronauts, policemen and firemen when they grow up, but very few of them follow through on these childhood ambitions. Which begs the question… when are feminists going to grow up? The real proof of the pudding is in the purchase (by female consumers), in this instance.

    In a society where women tend to do a disproportionate share of housework

    I can’t believe that people are still trotting out this nonesense. As others have pointed out, mowing the lawn, cleaning the gutters, maintaining the car, home repairs, any work that is too risky or dirty for dainty feminine hands is done overwhelmingly by men. Any work that you can do in your pyjamas doesn’t count. If you angst about keeping your shiny, fluffy stuff in the shiny, fluffy condition in which you purchased them on your swanning tours through shopping centres, then that is principally your problem, your OCD – do not expect a man out providing for your indulgences to also maintain them.

    What is it with feminists? Do they think that relentlessy repeating a lie makes it real? Sorry Amanda, in case you haven’t noticed, we don’t buy it any more (I never did, but then I’ve been in this MRA game about as long as Paul). Here’s the truth about this housework lie. It is naught but projection of women’s solipsism. It tells us everything that we need to know about women’s gratitude for men’s efforts. It tells us that the only thing that matters to women is me, me, me, I want, I need, I hurt.

    That men have bought into this lie with a question – “I’m not getting this… best defer to the li’l lady” – is also projection. Men have been projecting their rationality, and they’ve made the assumption that maybe there’s something that they’ve not understood. It is a demonstration of intelligence to assume the other person to be intelligent, and reason that their complaint must be justified, even if you don’t get it. But we get it now. We see your solipsism for what it is.

    we need evidence on whether that women actually consume more fuel and produce within the family than men do

    Others have responded to this, but I’d like to add that we have every reason to be skeptical of “studies” from cultures dominated by PC. For starters, how can you accurately differentiate between the purposes for which the car is purchased? Sort of coming in late to the conversation here, and not too sure if anyone covered this one, but many men, from tradesmen to business consultants and sales reps, use their cars for work, to produce and earn an income. They are too busy as providers to be swanning around shopping malls accruing lots of stuff. I know, because as a business consultant both for myself and my clients, I had to factor in the tax deductions relating to car use.

    As Paul has already pointed out, “studies” from Sweden (a country that I once respected having now become a laughing-stock) have all the credibility of farts masquerading as perfume.

    • mongo

      “Others have responded to this, but I’d like to add that we have every reason to be skeptical of “studies” from cultures dominated by PC.”

      Recently, a spokesman for a national business group, speaking on public media, observed that women were taking more time off work for illnesses than men. You can guess the response. He was publicly humiliated by other media commentators for a couple of weeks, then summarily sacked.

      The actual substance of his argument was never directly addressed. Americans familiar with the Laurence Sommers fiasco (who was fired from Harvard for making a non PC statement about female achievement in STEM subjects) will not be surprised.

      Not to risk a similar fate, the newly appointed head of the local exchange was quick to promote greater participation of women on publicly listed company boards – quoting studies that ‘prove better governance with females on boards’.

      One has to ask what sort of research would be produced by a society that sacks any man who mentions less than complimentary facts about female performance, no matter how true, no matter how diplomatically worded.

      It can only be corrupt. To the core.

  • Skeptic

    I’ve been waiting for the moment when the Men’s Rights Movement and the Environmental Movement converge and I’m delighted to see it happening here.

    OOO – Operation Opt Out fellas!
    Starve the Feminist Military Industrial Complex!

    I envisage that the benefits for both people and planet of men refusing to be used and abused as production appliances, or as Warren Farrel likes to say – as success objects will be profound.
    The fiscal cliff looms for USA and other societies where endless economic growth has been the mantra a model for as long as I can recall and I think it may be sparking thinking people to re-eveluate their values as the current model is broken.

    Here’s a concept I first discovered back in the 1980s which helped me to reframe the relative impoverishment I experienced thanks to my glutinous ex wife and rapacious femily caught system getting their teeth sunk deep into my assets. So deep in fact that I had a bank balance of ZERO, was sleeping for a few weeks on a buddy’s garage floor to save a deposit for a new rental apartment AND still had to pay child support for a kid I didn’t spend any time with due to his obstructive Mom.

    Voluntary austerity.

    Post divorce – living more simply meant I had more time for things I had forsaken previously by being her pussy whipped worker bee – friendships, community activities, physical exercise, study, hobbies, travel.
    All things so precious to me now that living simply so that others may simply live is part of who I am these days. There is no going back.
    For I reckon the income I have is probably not what it would have been had I stayed in the yoke of our marriage driven to greater and greater material prosperity. However, apart from losing my son due to parental alienation I’d have to say the QUALITY of my life is immeasurably better and whilst not claiming to be angelically environmental I’m not screwing the planet up anywhere near the level I was with her.
    I am now working towards a retirement scenario which is by many others standards humble.
    I am looking into small well insulated rural dwellings with as much off-grid power as I can figure out creating. The most energy efficient mode of transportation I can find, gardening, bee keeping, wine/beer making etc.

  • MGTOW-man

    Mr. Elam, I loved this article.

    Thank you for your candor, wit, bravery, and sure-footed approach.

    I love your ability to be truthful to women no matter how it looks, no matter how it sounds, no matter what it costs.

    I also am fond of a healthy environment. I have been this way all of my life. In my personal life, I do many things far too much to describe on these pages that cut back on waste, pollution, energy consumption, etc.

    In the beginning of this article, you wail on women for not being able to accept genuine and warranted scrutiny and criticism without feeling “hated” for having the truth to ponder that doesn’t meet their conveniences. You also get on the cases of men for supporting such silly action. …at least that is my interpretation of your words.

    You send a powerful message when you use “woman up”. “Man up” is constantly misunderstood, abused, exploited, and used against men and boys in manipulative, vicious and hateful ways. It is about time women understand that. Thus, forcing the shoe on the other foot is appropriate.

    Thank you for your wit, words, and wisdom.

  • relationship advice

    At least if you are going to use grand assumptions about men and women, make them positive like I do on my blog :) I am a woman, I don’t hardly ever wear make-up and I am very ecofriendly, as are a lot of women I know. Just like there are a lot of men who like consumer goods and are proud of it, despite the implications it may have on the environment. I don’t appreciate you telling me to grow up because of something I don’t even do. I do appreciate your intelligence and wit. Why not use it to help people unite and love one another? I feel so disconnected from your heart as you are ranting on about how more women need to be connected to the earth.

    • Paul Elam

      If you aren’t doing what I was talking about, then why would you assume I was talking to you or about you? Or does your vagina license you to react on behalf of all women?

    • Astrokid

      Yeah.. hardly ever wake makeup.. No sirree bob.. which is why your website has so many pics of you without makeup? or your youtube vids?
      How to Mesmerize a Man Using Your Femininity
      Nice tips you give there..
      1) Play with your man’s inner goofy.. show them the lighter side of life..coz many men cant get there without women
      Yeah.. is that why the best comedians, creative writers out there are women? the ones we fall over laughing? Have you heard of that misogynist Christopher Hitchens.. who said women aren’t funny?
      2) Show him how well you play tennis LOL yeah that should do it. He will feel like he’s with a child.
      It is good for the man to initiate the dates, etc etc, and for the woman to receive. Oh Good.. looks like we have an entitled bitch right here.
      3) Feminine energy is all about receiving, and saying thanks and being appreciative of all he does for the world. Masculine energy is about doing, and giving Oh its getting better, isn’t it.
      4)Show him that you are a confident woman, who doesnt get effected by slights. water off a ducks back
      Like you did with your comment? You dont understand the difference between a generalization and a universal statement do you.. so you thought the article applied to, you even though “you dont use makeup”.. whatever happened to water off the duck’s back?

      And re: you feeling disconnected with Paul’s heart Loony lady.. this is a Deepak Chopra-free zone. Men and Women here base their worth, and their relationship with their partners, on values that overcome base biological and cultural programming.
      Chris Rock has your kind of women and men well pegged.
      Chris Rock – what do women want & what do men want

      • Marcus

        I’m sorry for downvoting you, it was a mistake. and the site’s not letting me upvote.

  • shadow

    I’m going to look for some advice here, is there anyway I can convince my husband to tell me the truth even if I wont like it? It had never occurred to me that was the way things are. I had heard the basic environmental issues and that we should recycle and such, but never anyone point out what effect women in particular can have on it.

    • Astrokid

      You start telling the truth, and letting your actions speak louder than your words. Its more of a test for you. Once he sees you follow the truth, he will be more comfortable telling the truth himself.
      Change always starts with oneself.