Judith Grossman

Fuck you, Judith Grossman

I am a feminist. I have marched at the barricades, subscribed to Ms. Magazine, and knocked on many a door in support of progressive candidates committed to women’s rights. ~ Judith Grossman, Wall Street Journal, 04/16/2013

The above quote contains the opening lines of a current Wall Street Journal article titled, Judith Grossman: A Mother, a Feminist, Aghast. They are the last positive things she had to say about feminism.

The rest of the article was dedicated to how her son, who she understandably did not mention by name, was railroaded by his liberal arts college in New England on the basis of a sexual assault allegation that his former girlfriend decided to report years after it allegedly happened.

Grossman details what happened to him with appropriate outrage. She tells us his story, which begins with him sending her a panicked text message, and walks us through how the school made a mockery of due process and the presumption of innocence. She even refers us to Title IX and alludes to the “Dear Colleague” directive from the Obama Administration, which instructs schools to reduce the standard of proof in sexual assault cases from the time honored standard of “reasonable doubt,” to the much more lax and slippery “preponderance of evidence.”

She complains that there was no evidence against her son at all, save the word of his ex-girlfriend. She even asks a question aloud, as though no one before her ever bothered to ask it:

Who knew that American college students are required to surrender the Bill of Rights at the campus gates?

She closes her article, which simmered and  seethed from start to finish, in a state of bewilderment, lamenting that the pursuit of women’s rights combined with politically motivated government policy is turning our schools into a “snake pit of injustice.”

That is a very strong condemnation – coming from a fucking snake.

Judith Grossman is just now finding out about one, and just one, of the many tertiary stage products of a narcissistic ideology that has run amok with her blind enabling for her entire adult life. She, rather her son, is paying the price for a half century of hatred disguised as women’s rights advocacy, and so suddenly she is filled with indignation and outrage. She wonders aloud how all this could have happened. She wonders what possibly have gone so wrong, right under her nose.

Fuck you, Judith Grossman. Fuck you right where you stand.

Before being rattled from your solipsistic coma, there were countless other outrages happening to young men in this culture. Did you notice them? Or did you figure it was all a good thing for the sisterhood till your baby boy wound up with his entire future on the line in a system that was designed by those of your ilk to chew him up and spit him out?

Have you noticed the other students, Judith? Or more accurately, have you noticed how many of them are male? Your son is the minority now, as more and more young men are falling from the ranks of education thanks to your feminism.

But I am betting, Judith, that even if you did notice, you did not give a damn. Not as long as YOUR boy was getting HIS degree. Right?

That is the problem with your remarkably successful campaign of wanton self-interest. It feels great until the bill comes due. Unfortunately for your son, Mommy is not the one that has to cough up the tab.

He is. And the world you built is not done with him yet.

I take that he is not married, yet. Chances are he will be, and if that is the case you, no, he, will also get another dose of your medicine if and when he ends up in a family court, stripped of his rights and under an ax that will make his school’s “honor” court look like a vacation in the Bahamas.

He will have you to thank for it, just like so many other sons of single mothers and feminists who have exploited chivalry and pushed for misandric treatment of men in the judicial system.

And if it happens; if they take his home, his children, his income, his freedom and leave him to an impoverished life, as they have so many other sons of women like you, you will be back at WSJ, moaning and gnashing teeth and shouting into a compassionless void about what has happened to your son.

No one will care, Judith. The world will grease its gears with his guts and keep on humming along, like he was never even there.

Your only hope now, if it is indeed not too late, is to vociferously reject the ideology you embraced as long as it served your selfish needs. Your only redemption is to attack it with all the might you have at your disposal, and shine the light on every hypocrisy you have ever fostered, every lie you have ever told and every self-serving agenda you once lauded as the answer for humanity. And you need to do it till your dying breath.

I get the distinct feeling that you won’t, however. I think all that has happened here is that you have had your little entitled hissy fit because Junior got bent over by the system you helped push on the world around you.

Once he is in the clear, and the pieces of his nearly destroyed life have been put back together, I am thinking you will have your unseeing eyes right back on the pages of Ms. Magazine, spending the remainder of your disgust on “patriarchy” or bemoaning a fabricated “rape culture,” and ignoring the rape hysteria that almost put an end to your son’s future.

I am betting you will be back to supporting those “progressive candidates” that were the architects of your son’s near destruction.

I could be wrong. It would not be the first or last time. If so, I am sure many people who are actually waking up to the destruction of feminism will be happy to see it. I know I will.

But until then, as I have already said, fuck you.

About Paul Elam

Paul Elam is the founder and publisher of A Voice for Men, the founder of A Voice for Men Radio, the AVfM YouTube Channel, and appears weekly on AVFM Intelligence Report, Going Mental with Dr. Tara Palmatier and weekly on MANstream Media with Warren Farrell and Tom Golden.

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  • meanlevee

    I heard Girl Writes What reading this on her page. Damned scintillating.

  • mongo

    This feminist was never fighting for human rights – she wanted special protection for her and hers. How could anything that feels so right be wrong after all?

    Well, this is how it can be so wrong sister.

    You’ve had privilege for so long you don’t really know what the word means. You thought you could ‘fight’ for more privilege, and even your favored intimates could be brought under your umbrella.

    As if you couldn’t figure it out all yourself – create a world that disenfranchises all men and guess what: that includes your son. Yes, your son. He’s as second-class as the rest of us.

    Thanks to you.

  • http://www.avoiceformen.com Dr. F (Ian Williams)

    Watch here, for one day her son will tell his side of it.

  • MGTOW-man

    Most of these latter comments reek of us MHRA’s knowing darn well that it is the irrationality-laced emotions of certain women that is driving the hatred of males and thus, the biased laws. I could go on and on, stating numerous examples, but I feel like a broken record.

    Cut to the chase: teach our boys that women, potentially, if left unchecked, will tend to allow their emotions to define, skew, and cloud issues to the point that everything is gynocentric…but without themselves even knowing it. They will do this in ways that they, themselves are unaware.

    Women such as this are deeply afraid to be objective for being so just might, and will, not procure the best option that makes them FEEL better. It doesn’t say what they want to feel. That is the nutshell.

    Knowing darned well on the professional level that subjectivity is wrong when mixed with these issues, they still allow themselves to behave as they do these days. It is a perfect example of them being dangerously unfit for public rule-making.

    Perhaps we are scratching the surface, again, (historically) as to just why women were left out of so many things in yesteryear.

    Not able to put a finger on it then, but there were good reasons for most of the “unfair” rules (face value) that existed in yesteryear.

    Women do not want to admit this and men are too scared to be honest.

    I am not scared. The very first step in becoming a true MHRA is to make yourself be honest…yes, even about this. To leave it out and not teach it to the boys, is to leave the most influential gear of feminism intact. Women are more alike than different. It is the epicenter or the core, if you will, of the monster we are fighting.

    But I do sincerely thank the women who have their heads on straight and who do not let their feelings dominate them—such as those who contribute here on our behalves. I welcome them because, unlike the other women, and indeed probably most women, they do not have the nasty habit of making EVERYTHING about themselves. The world is larger than women collectively, not the other way around. Our good women here understand that.

    Sure they do!

  • Grassee

    This is kind of reminiscent of MWM’s video “The Other Man is You.” In which he said what men needed to do was recognise that the rapists and wife batterers, etc, that feminists have launched a crusade against isn’t some other “bad” man. It is ALL men. And the other man is you, yourself.

    Conversely, maybe what women need to see is that the other man is “your son.”

  • Flo604

    Judith Grossman will be pushed off by her own feminists very fast , because now she suddenly became “the enemy”.

  • michael steane

    I’m waiting for Zach Rosenburg to have his moment of clarity. It’ll probably be something along the same lines as Judith Grosssmans’s.

  • Alogon

    Well, her son might be guilty of one of the 98% of rapes I somehow hear about that are never ever reported. Like maybe he “raped” someone with his aggressive, male-privileged, sexually-oppressive eyes. Or he could have had sex with someone who 5 years later didn’t remember consenting or just changed her mind so her friends wouldn’t think she was a slut. Or maybe he just built a giant snow penis on campus and forced his male sexual violence on to the entire female body and thereby prevented a generation of young girls from ever being able to get in science and math and thereafter invent a completely new society from the ground up where everything is just that much better because men didn’t make it.
    For that injustice that he must surely be culpable because of his testicles.

  • greg

    On campus, it has never been “beyond a reasonable doubt.” That’s criminal court.
    AAUP, always had “Clear and convincing” standard, which theoretically is over 75%. preponderance of evidence is “over 50%.” Plus their was due process.

    Fuck you Judith.

    My Girl read this article today, and she is not happy. Her son is at risk.

  • Robert Riversong

    Judith Grossman has, as have many truly progressive feminists, courageously spoken out against the tide of militant feminism that is depriving men of fundamental rights, such as due process and the presumption of innocence.

    That Paul Elam has nothing to say to such personal courage than “FUCK YOU” places him as far out in the fringe of hate-based male chauvinism as any rabid feminist is in the other direction, and has thereby permanently and irredeemably undermined whatever legitimacy the Men’s Rights Movement, and particularly A Voice For Men, might have had.

    As one of the most vocal opponents of the radical version of feminism which has so influenced both academia and the beltway, I welcome and appreciate what is often called “equity feminism” (of which Grossman is clearly part), that is based on the “first-wave” belief in gender equality.

    Paul Elam is clearly as blind to the many shades of modern feminist thought as the radical misandrist feminists are to the spectrum of men and masculinity in American society. Both should be equally condemned and ostracized.

    • driversuz

      I think “Fuck You” is a perfectly appropriate response to a person who has devoted her life to creating a system in which bigotry is deeply entrenched, who then wrings her hands in distress when that bigotry hits the “wrong” (according to her) target.

      Do tell us all about the “many shades of modern feminist thought” which not only condemn “radical feminism” on Tumblr, but actively seek to remove its influence from our media, our governments and out educations systems. Please include citations.

      I don’t think its Paul Elam who is blind here.

      • Robert Riversong

        Clearly, you share Elam’s willful ignorance and blind prejudice, which – just like misandrist militant feminism – paints “the other” with a single brush.

        Among the many feminists who have been sharply critical of the extremes of feminists are Warren Farrel (author of The Myth of Male Power), Camille Paglia (author of Vamps and Tramps), Christina Sommer (author of Who Stole Femimism), Karen DeCrow (former president of NOW), Katie Roiphe (author of The Morning After: Fear, Sex and Feminism), Wendy McElroy (editor of ifeminists.com).

        • driversuz

          Would that be the same Warren Farrell who spoke at AVfM’s International Conference on Men’s Issues last summer? You forgot to mention Erin Pizzey, who also spoke.

          Speaking of “willful ignorance,” if you search AVfM for those names you will find them mentioned more than once, and you will find that more than one of them publish on this site. It helps if you know how to spell their names.

          • Robert Riversong

            We can add Betty Friedan (author of The Feminine Mystique, founder and first president of NOW) and Cathy Young (contributor to Reason, Newsday and RealClearPolitics.com and author of Ceasefire!: Why Women and Men Must Join Forces to Achieve True Equality) to the list, and there are hundreds more.

            That some of them have “been mentioned” here only further reveals your willful ignorance of the breadth and variety of the feminist movement.

    • driversuz

      Strike 1: This is a friendly warning that you may need to re-read our Comment Policy, in particular the bits about general attack, general insult (particularly with respect to staff and authors) and general contempt for the work AVfM does. [Ref: 2969]

      Additional remarks:

      Tone Police

      • Robert Riversong

        If “Fuck You” is acceptable language from the founder of this site, then my very mild and far more honest critique can hardly be considered a violation of anything, other than your attempt to censor legitimate debate.

        • driversuz

          Your critique was indeed mild, in a tone typical of the average Concern Troll, but it was anything but honest. If you had any desire to be honest, you’d have done your research, starting with reading more than a couple of pages of AVfM. When you actually know what you’re talking about, feel free to contribute something besides shopworn “Nice Feminist” talking points.

          • Robert Riversong

            It’s YOU who is acting as the perfect little “concern troll”.

            I am quite familiar with this site, as I’ve been a central voice in the men’s movement for decades and have published some of the most critical exposes on radical feminism and the “rape culture” meme.

            If you were half as aware and honest as you pretend to be, you would know that.

          • driversuz

            If you are as familiar with this site as you claim, then you are misrepresenting it intentionally. Goodbye.

          • driversuz

            You have been banned because of a serious and direct violation of Comment Policy (general insult (particularly with respect to staff and authors), derailing, trolling and general contempt for the work AVfM does). [Ref: 2975]

            Additional remarks:

            Starts out sounding somewhat credible, ends up dodging and weaving. In very short order. Textbook derailing time waster.

          • driversuz

            You might want to look into the actual opinions (regarding AVfM) of some of those people you admire.