How to Avoid a False Rape Claim

Sometimes there is nothing an innocent guy can do to avoid a false rape claim. Sometimes he is just in the wrong place at the wrong time. But a significant number of false rape claims can be avoided by exercising caution and staying clear of situations where the likelihood of a false rape claim is enhanced.

When it comes to rape, political correctness gone mad tells us we should not even suggest advising our daughters to avoid certain situations where rape is more likely to occur (they call it “victim blaming” — as if the mere admonition to “be careful” transfers blame for a rape from the rapist to the victim). It would be unfortunate if we similarly hesitated to urgeour sons to minimize the risk of false rape claims out of some warped, politicized sense of principle. The long-term damage from a false rape claim is so potentially enormous that every reasonable effort should be taken to avoid one. Make no mistake, the onus for a false rape claim is on the false accuser, just as the onus for rape is on the rapist. But failing to discourage our young people from putting themselves in harm’s way just to make a political point is something no sane parent should ever do.

Having closely studied the false rape phenomenon for a considerable period of time, we have compiled a short list of situations where the likelihood of a false rape claim is enhanced. We’ve run similar lists in the past, and we are constantly updating it. A lot of it is common sense.  Sometimes, more than one of these situations is present in a given instance, thus increasing the likelihood of a false rape claim.

One important point needs to be made at the outset: the vast majority of women would never tell a rape lie under any circumstance, just as the vast majority of men would never rape under any circumstance.

Here are the situations to watch for:

Where the woman will feel a need to deny her consensual tryst to someone important in her life.

This one can’t be overstated. It is the foremost reason why women lie about rape. In Prof. Kanin’s first landmark false rape study, he found that the motive to cover up a sudden illicit encounter was the primary motivation for false rape claims. It is manifested in a variety of ways, but if you remember the general principle, you should be able to spot the warning signs.

If a woman feels a need to keep the affair from someone important to her, she is more likely to falsely cry rape because she fears the tryst will become known. How will it become known?  She might fear that she has become impregnated, or that she has contracted a sexually transmitted disease, or that you will reveal the affair to someone and that it will get back to the person(s) she wants to keep it from. In light of these fears, some women figure that the only way to avoid blame is to make a preemptive false rape claim.  It is cruel and heartless to the falsely accused male lover, but, sadly, it is more common than we’d like to think.

Specific situations where this occurs:

(1) Having sex with a woman who has a husband or a boyfriend.  Aside from the moral considerations of interfering with someone’s marriage or committed relationship, you should avoid this at all costs because it is ground zero for a false rape claim. Even if you think the woman is estranged from her husband or boyfriend, you may not know for sure, and there is always the possibility they will get back together soon. Too often, the innocent male won’t know that she’s married or has a boyfriend — a cautionary tale about the dangers of bedding a woman you don’t know well.

(2) If the woman is young, or if she is still under her parents’ emotional thumb and they either disapprove of you or of her having sex. If a girl needs to hide the fact that she’s having sex with you from a parent, as most teen girls below college age do, you are playing with fire.  Moreover, sex with college-age women or older is sometimes problematic if she is still under her parents’ financial or emotional thumb, and if they disapprove either of her having sex, or of you.

(3) If the woman would be embarrassed to let her friends know she is serious about you. If you are the quarterback of your school’s NCAA division one football team, chances are, this won’t be a problem. If you are a geek who’s not very popular but who “gets lucky” one night while you’re both drinking, you stand a greater chance of a false rape claim the next morning.

(4) Group sex where there was one woman and multiple guys.Think Hofstra.  This is a recipe for a false rape claim. Ground zero, in fact.  We’ve seen this multiple times. The reasons are obvious: how on earth can she possibly explain this to a boyfriend, a parent, or a friend? How will she hold her head up on campus? Most sane young women will deeply regret that encounter after-the-fact and will worry that if word got out, it would destroy what’s left of her reputation. The fear of “slut shaming,” as the feminists call it, seems to spawn off-the-charts regret, and that is a false rape claim waiting to happen.  Men should never, ever put themselves in this awful situation.

Nasty break-ups.

Divorce and custody disputes spawn false rape claims in order for the woman to gain the upper hand in the dispute.

Spurned ex-lovers sometimes use false rape claims as a tool of revenge.  If you are cheating on a wife or a girlfriend, a false rape claim is more likely, and many people will view it as a sort of justified payback.

These situations are sometimes difficult to avoid and give men even more reason (1) not to cheat, and (2) to do a much better job of getting their know the woman before getting serious with her.

Where it will be confusing as to whether rape occurred.

The alcohol-fueled hook-up culture is a disaster for both men and women. To suggest that couples should never drink and fool around denies eons of accumulated knowledge about gender relations.  Couples often drink to lower inhibitions, knowing full well where it will lead. It’s drinking to excess that’s the problem, especially for college-aged couples and slightly older. Asking the police or a jury to sort out what happened afterwards based on a “he said/she said” account puts an impossible burden on our law enforcement and judicial apparatuses. Young men looking to “score” in that situation need to understand that (1) when women drink to excess, at some point, they lose the ability to factually and legally consent, and the breaking point is very difficult to discern; and (2) women experience much greater after-the-fact regret than men do. Sometimes feelings of regret are translated into feelings of “being used,” and sometimes feelings of “being used” are misinterpreted or purposefully misconstrued as “rape.” Unfortunately, it is the politically correct thing to urge young women to party like the guys — without bothering to tell them about the regret asymmetry that separates the genders.

Big age differentials.

Older male, much younger female. A false rape claim is less plausible when it involves peers around the same age because the likelihood of a consensual relationship is greater among same-age partners. When a teen girl below the age of consent accuses a middle-aged man of rape, there is no possibility of legal consent, and actual consent seems less likely than if she was having sex with a same-age boy. Moreover, the older man/young girl allegation is generally viewed as so terribly loathsome that the mantra “guilty until proven innocent” is truly a reality for this one.  Even when a young woman beyond the age of consent accuses a middle-aged man of rape, the initial inclination is to assume he’s a lecherous old man, and that she would have no desire to have consensual sex with someone like that.

Teen boy, older woman. Sometimes women (they are often teachers) who statutorily rape teen boys will twice victimize them by falsely accusing them of rape. Such tactic has facial plausibility, given the male-as-predator stereotype and the exploding hormones of teen boys. It is especially disturbing that a woman would, as the cliche goes, throw her callow young lover under the bus in order to save herself.  This is almost always a situation where the woman will feel a tremendous need to deny the tryst to someone important in her life — often her husband, her children, her friends, the principal at the school where she works, and the school board, all at once.

Certain professions more readily lend themselves to false rape claims.

If you are male and are a school teacher, a police officer, an ambulance paramedic, or a cab driver, you need to be especially vigilant.

Police officers are at risk because some women charged with crimes lie about rape out of revenge or to claim that the charges were trumped up.

Ambulance paramedics and cab drivers are sometimes targeted by delusional women or women looking for an excuse for some indiscretion (refusing to pay a cab fare is a big one).

Teachers are forced to interact with many girls who are experiencing significant emotional and hormonal changes and whose immature judgment allows them to do things a more mature person wouldn’t do. The ease with which a false claim can be made is a concern for male teachers, and that profession, more than the others, is attuned to these dangers.

The woman is unstable.

This is often impossible to spot, at least initially. We’ve reported here on a woman who sent a man to prison for five years because she was bored.  Another woman tried to destroy the life of a man she didn’t even know with a rape lie because he wouldn’t give her a beer. A girl accused another man of rape for throwing a flower at her. Innumerable women tell rape lies for attention or sympathy.  Some women are just plain nuts, and men who are close to them stand a greater chance of being smeared by a rape lie.

The woman has no compunction about lying.

This one surely overlaps with the others. If a woman is sufficiently selfish that she has no difficulty lying — to extricate herself from trouble or for other reasons, she may not even need one of the reasons noted above to tell a rape lie.  Some women will tell rape lies to avoid getting into trouble for being late for work.   Liars are dangerous, and are to be avoided at all costs. Again, this personality type will almost always be impossible to spot immediately.

The best way to avoid a false rape claim is not to engage in sexual relations outside a committed relationship. In my belief-system, that means a stable marriage to someone you trust. I fully realize that this will strike some as old-fashioned and moralizing; I also appreciate that in this no-fault divorce era where 70% of all divorces are initiated by women who are afforded significant advantages in family law courts biased against fathers, that a happy marriage is all too often elusive. I merely point out that false rape claims are virtually non-existent in a happy marriage.

Here endeth the sermon.

About False Rape Society

The False Rape Society is dedicated to giving voice to the men and women harmed by false accusations. The two founders, Pierce Harlan and E. Steven Berkimer are regular contributors to A Voice for Men.

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  • Jimmy K.

    Maybe we can put this in the textbooks for students.
    Oh, I’m sorry for this Political Incorrect comment (ahum…)

  • Poester99

    Print out a 1000 copies and give it out at your local College or University Campus.

    • http://men-factor.blogspot.com The ScareCrow formerly known as Richard

      Wow, I like this idea.

      I will be searching through the “special collections” archive at my local University soon (when I get the time).

      Yeah, I could “accidentally” drop stacks of the above article all around the campus.

      Excellent suggestion.

  • AvgGuy

    The women who commit these crimes are sex offenders and should be treated as such.

  • http://www.CanadaCourtWatch.com Attila L. Vinczer

    I have read this piece and have followed many stories at The False Rape Society who maintain an excellent record of false rape cases and related matters concerning it.

    Currently I am assisting a father who has been convicted of rape, incest, sexual interference and sexual assault without any evidence but on the mere word of the daughter! This carries a total of 44 years behind bars in Canada! I attended at court in Bracebridge, Ontario on December 8, 2010 where this innocent man was to be sentenced. The Crown Attorney was seeking between 4-7 years in the penitentiary! This is pretty much a death sentence as child molesters are targeted by inmates with mortal intentions. And perhaps a real child molester is deserving of such fate, but NOT those who are innocent and there are many like that.

    In the case I am involved with there is a publication ban, so I must be extremely careful what I write as I too could end up behind bars for violating the court order should I expose the alleged victim or anyone else that would connect back to the victim.

    I will however report this. The man’s daughter was bitter that her dad would not tolerate her being belligerent towards his fiancée and her sister. She being 24 at the time was told to change her ways and only then would she be welcome in their home. This infuriated her! There were other pieces that added to years of anger, drug and alcohol use and a mother who took little care in ensuring this daughter was raised properly.

    The alleged victim’s younger brother was traveling with her in a in the summer of 2009 while she was openly discussing with a girlfriend how she had a plan to ruin dad’s life. (The defense lawyer failed to put this boy on the stand!) That is exactly what she did when she went to the police to bring about these false allegations. From what has happened, the lawyer this man hired and paid over $20,000.00 (borrowed money!) should only be allowed to practice his ABCs and 123s but NOT law, and certainly NOT criminal law. An aggressive Crown Attorney and the lack of sound legal defense had this man found guilty by a Jury! WOW!

    I was called to help soon after that and so far have his current lawyer of record doing his job, but listening to him perform in court, he should NEVER set foot in a courtroom to speak. Just not capable of it! We managed to keep this man out of jail on a technicality as they violated his rights, being an aboriginal. So he is now awaiting a report from the Aboriginal community before they can sentence him. Imagine being in his shoes when you are innocent and must endure this because of your own rebellious and vindictive daughter! I have also managed to connect him with James Lockyer who was responsible to set Guy Paul Moran and William Mullins-Johnson free. William was recently awarded $4.25 million by the Ontario Government for being wrongly incarcerated for 12 years! What a travesty!

    His conviction was strongly driven by the CAS/CPS and by disgraced pathologist charles randal smith who ruined countless lives by producing defective and at times non existant facts before the courts. For example the alleged pubic hair the Crown Attorney got from charles randal smith was in fact a DOG HAIR!!! Incredulously James Lockyer found this in the Doctors office on his desk after receive a search warrant!

    I digressed from the story of the man I am helping. What is astounding is that right after this man got home from court after being found guilty, his daughter calls and breaks down and apologizes to him for lying in court! Simply unbelievable! Had he been tape recording then he would be clear today. Now we must wait for the appeal and could take another 6 or more months to clear his name. Then charges should be laid for the false allegation made by this foolhardy daughter!

    When I was in court on December 8, 2010 I watched as the now 25 year old daughter, the ex wife, her boyfriend, a female counselor, and the female police detective who arrested him were ALL laughing and giggling in open court while matters were being dealt with and the convicted innocent man was about to be cuffed and taken to prison.

    I beg the question. Is it normal for a woman who has been raped to be able to giggle in court about such a serious matter, or is it that she was giggling due to the happiness of being able to send her father to prison as her way of getting even with him? I wonder? I really wonder?

    False accusations by women are at an epidemic level. They bring these allegations against men for countless reasons. Vengeance, custody battles, to save face with parents, husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends and on and on as can be better read at the False Rape Society.

    This is all good business for the divorce and legal industry as they reap all the monetary rewards. I don’t know for sure but surmise it is a multi billion dollar a year industry.

    The tide is shifting slowly as some women ARE being sent to prison for making false allegations, but most are laughing all the way to the bank (getting assets while the male is in prison) or just from the pleasure they seek in destroying an innocent man, such as what I witnessed at the Bracebridge Courthouse on December 8, 2010! Disgusting egregiousness!

    Respectfully,
    Attila L. Vinczer

  • !!SPARTA!!

    Don’t be of a minority ethnical decent and fuck a White or Asian chick
    Because there’s sometimes this social stigma. and even if the girl isn’t racist, her friends/family may be.

    • AntZ

      I am surprised that this was not a bulleted point in the article.

      Cross-culture or cross-race relationships can be a cause for shame in certain communities. One way for a woman to avoid shame is to cry rape.

  • Carlos

    FRS: The best way to avoid a false rape claim is not to engage in sexual relations outside a committed relationship. In my belief-system, that means a stable marriage to someone you trust.

    At the risk of seeming to trivialize rape in the way feminists do, and with all due respect to an otherwise great article, avoiding a false rape charge by getting financially, emotionally and psychologically raped during an almost certain divorce doesn’t seem like a winning strategy. We have all trusted someone we should not have. Preferably we haven’t married that mistake and God help you if you get it pregnant.

  • http://echosofwhisperspast.wordpress.com/ Capt. DaPoet

    Marriage almost always to the male being FINANCIALLY RAPED and not necessarily in a divorce…Hence I don’t recommend marriage but CELIBACY as the only viable option…

    • Johnny Come-Lately

      You can STILL be accused as a virgin.

  • Promoman

    This article needs to be in homes like a Bible.

  • rebtus

    This evening it was on the TV that a false rape claim hac been made by news reporter for TV. The story is very sympathetic to her and even though she could face a year in jail, they doubt she will. Link:
    http://www.allmediany.com/details_news_article.php?news_artid=462

  • KARMA MRA MGTOW

    Kinda on topic.

    Australian acquitted of NY rape
    December 18, 2010 – 10:55AM

    An Australian farmer has walked out of a New York court a free man after a jury took just five hours of deliberations to acquit him of allegations he raped a woman during a wild night of drinking and partying in Manhattan.

    David Green, 29, a sheep and cattle farmer from northern NSW who was locked up in New York’s infamous Riker’s Island jail for the past 18 months awaiting trial, had one simple request.

    “I want a steak and a beer,” an emotional Mr Green, surrounded by family and friends who flew in from Australia to support him during the trial, told the New York Post newspaper.
    Advertisement: Story continues below

    Mr Green plans to hit back hard at the 28-year-old Long Island woman who accused him of the rape, by filing a $US1 million civil lawsuit against her.

    “We are filing a lawsuit against the complainant in the case for $US1 million basically because she filed false charges against my client and he spent 18 months in jail because of it,” Mr Green’s lawyer, Ron Fischetti, told AAP.

    Mr Green faced a 25-year jail sentence.

    The 12-member New York jury, however, did not buy the woman’s story that Mr Green raped her while she was unconscious on a bed in his hotel room.

    Mr Green and his three friends were bar-hopping in Manhattan on August 15, 2005, when they bumped into the woman and her female friend. The two groups, who had never met, returned to Mr Green’s suite at Manhattan’s Affinia hotel where they continued drinking.

    On Monday Mr Green took to the witness stand and told the jury the woman performed a consensual sex act on him, but they did not have intercourse.

    Last week the woman told a different story, testifying how she blacked out after consuming a large quantity of alcohol and woke up on a bed in the suite where Mr Green was having sex with her.

    “The jury obviously didn’t believe the complainant or her friend,” Mr Fischetti said.

    “We spoke to the jurors afterward and that’s why they acquitted him. They said it was just a false story.”

    Mr Green still may face jail time, as the jury convicted him of a reckless endangerment charge for throwing bottles, plates and cups off the balcony of his 26th floor hotel suite during the drunken night.

    He admitted doing so during his testimony on Monday, but his lawyer believes he will be sentenced for time served.

    Mr Green will be sentenced next month.

    Soon after Mr Green was charged in 2005 with rape he jumped bail and fled to Australia where he ran his father’s farm at Raleigh, near Coffs Harbour, for three and a half years.

    It was not until he applied for an Australian passport in 2009 that Australian and US authorities were alerted he was a fugitive and he was arrested and brought back to New York by US Marshalls.

    “I was 24-years-old, I was terrified, I panicked,” Mr Green, explaining why he skipped bail, said.

    “I was facing substantial jail time for a crime I didn’t commit.”

    Ref: http://www.theage.com.au/national/australian-acquitted-of-ny-rape-20101218-1913w.html

  • bob

    The best way to avoid a false rape claim is to stay as far you can of ALL women (or child). Do not work, do not participate to this insane culture and hope to stay under radar.

    • !!SPARTA!!

      that’s not ridiculous at all…

    • Johnny Come-Lately

      Just don’t piss anybody off.

  • Mrs. W.

    Thank you for publishing this.

    I’m a young, married, antifeminist woman. One of the things I seriously worry about is if I have sons and how to avoid false rape. (I saw the fallout from a false rape my freshman year of college.)

    I had only ever thought of the fuzzy alcohol scenario, so your article will be immensely helpful in the future.

    • Johnny Come-Lately

      Tell your sons to save all their texts and not to say anything that could be interpreted wrong out of context. If it’s a Age-of-Consent above 18 state, he will have serious problems. If it’s the rest of the country, he will be safer. California is 18. All of New England is 16.

  • AnontheAnonymous

    “The best way to avoid a false rape claim is not to engage in sexual relations outside a committed relationship.”

    Bingo. And that is EXACTLY what the feminists want. For it to be if not impossible, then extremely dangerous for men to have sex outside of committed relationships. A strong factor in feminism is the sexual trade union. The same reason that they oppose pornography and prostitution is why they appose hook ups. Not to protect women, but to retain the sexual monopoly (power) older women once enjoyed before the pill let loose all the pretty young girls.

    • Bewildered

      Great analysis ! But it’s a damned if you do damned if you don’t situation,unless you have found someone like Typhon Blue. So is MGTOW the only solution?Pretty depressing and doesn’t augur well for mankind if this is going to be the trend all over the world.

    • Fat Lip

      woman can fabricate a false claim, there are tons of these types working for the police, pimps and so on that will do whatever it takes to frame you for your money

  • she123

    Hello, I came across this site as I was trying to understand why a 14 yr. old girl would say that her father raped her when there was absolutely no way it could have happened because the father was never alone with her. In this case I believe that there are psychological issues surrounding years of abuse by the mother and stepfather and now being removed from the home to live with grandparents and a father who hasn’t seen her in 8 years. Charges were not laid against the father, because of the situation.
    I wanted to comment on your list of situations for men to avoid. I think that your list is good advice for men and for women. These exact same situations are also situations where women are really raped and don’t come forward. Both sexes would do well to avoid these situations, or at least be cautious. I deplore rapists, and I also deplore people who make any type of false accusations–no one deserves to be a victim of either.

  • http://Human-Stupidity.com Human-Stupidity.com

    Why would having a long term relationship make you safe against false rape charges?

    If you ever have sex with your wife while she is drunk, if you ever stick your tongue inside her vagina or anus without asking her consent, if your wife ever gets pissed and falsely accuses you of any such acts …….. you are history!

    How are you going to defend yourself against accusations that 28 years ago you had sex with your wife after she had 3 drinks? Or that you shoved your tongue inside without permissin while consensually licking her ass 9 years ago?

    • Fat Lip

      anus???? you have some issues man

  • http://Human-Stupidity.com Human-Stupidity.com

    This article also totally overlooks that you don’t need any sexual relations to be a victim of false rape accusations.

    To avoid false rape claims, you should not transport women in your taxi, for example. Or at least you should not insist on getting your taxi fare from a woman who does not want to pay, the same way you would insist with a man. In general, you should not piss off any woman so she would be motivated to get even with you.

    But yes, had Strauss-Kahn gotten his blow job from a male room clerk, it would have been a lot safer.

    But, really, you need to heed advice from Human-Stupidity.com and record all your sexual transactions on film: "Rape is rape is rape" is a lie, Joe Biden! 20 different types of rape!   Birth-Rape: Feminists’ Constant Expanding of the Definition of Rape Has Created 24 Different Types of Rape

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  • firenech

    Crud. I wish I’d read this article when it was posted.

    It happened to me (harassment, not rape, though).

    Need to cover up her hitting on me (under her parents’ emotional thumb)? check
    Age disparity? check
    At-risk Profession? check
    Emotionally unstable? check check check CHECK!
    No compunction about lying? check

    • Johnny Come-Lately

      What’s odd is that being accused of crime you didn’t commit can feel like rape. And definitely if you go to jail, they’ll be some actual rape.

  • Daniel Kulkarni

    Helpful article, but I can’t help but feel that after looking at these warning signs, the only logical choice, for me, is not to date.

    • Johnny Come-Lately

      Your assumption: Abstinence is a safe bet.

      Wrong! You could be a virgin and get falsely accused. Wow – That is a horrifying thought.

      I practice law and I’ve seen four cases of sexual assault accusation. Three were recanted. Turns out it’s a great way to gain leverage in custody battles. One of the guys was a Marine that had a controlling mom that trained younger sister to accuse brother. DNA evidence proved him innocent. The police didn’t want to allow his sister’s accusation retraction because they said it was influenced by guilt. But crazy mom was pissed that son (bread winner) stopped the checks coming home. She threatened to make his life hell and she did. He was kicked out of the Marines based on just the accusation. It gets complicated about UCMJ vs. civilian court … point is – you’re never safe.

      • Daniel Kulkarni

        That’s true, but being celibate does greatly reduce your chances. Especially if you’re not making money hand over fist, you won’t even register on most women’s radars. You’d be most likely to get falsely accused for attention in such a case.

        • Johnny Come-Lately

          Yes! Witnesses are essential. Now that women are in the military, they have to do the “buddy system.” Witnesses prevent lying accusers from making it a sworn testimony match (he-said-she-said).