Domestic Violence

Domestic violence statistics, laws and information for men

The following article on Domestic Violence statistics, laws, and information as it pertains to the Men’s Human Rights Movement, is intended to maintain a live document to which our community can continually add information.

The end goal is both practical and experimental; to maintain one core document that encompasses exhaustive information about domestic violence, and to use it to spread the truth.

At the end of this article is a contact form that you are encouraged to use to add relevant information as it relates to Domestic Violence, statistics, laws, and other information that is pertinent to our mission. Additionally, it is important to use the social sharing icons located at the end of this document to propagate this article on the many major social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter, Google+, and others so that other Men and Women who are affected by bad Domestic Violence laws can learn, educate, and get involved in our movement.

A Voice For Men Statements on Domestic Violence

Domestic Violence is a serious issue facing all of humanity. Violence reduction against all humans requires a collaborative effort that is solution and evidence based; not grounded in governmental politics,  sexual politics or gender ideology. Amelioration efforts must encompass proven interventions, both in treating victims and perpetrators and in providing legal remedies that serve the purpose of amelioration.

All these strategies must produce a sustained effort with informed sensitivities to men, women, and in particular, children, instead of using misdirection and other tactics that are designed to further ideological agendas and fund organizations.

Click on any tab for more reading


[tabs style=”default”] [tab title=”Laws”]When talking about Domestic Violence laws, the combination of how violence is defined in the Violence Against Women Act and how these matters are prosecuted collide to create an environment that is dangerous for men, women and children and for members of their extended families who have to endure the fallout.

Influential definitions of violence, put forth by politicized legal experts, include non-violent acts such as pointing a finger while speaking in an elevated voice and other perhaps uncomfortable, but essentially non-violent acts. Those definitions, as presented in VAWA are completely subjective.

Terms like “if you feel like…” are commonly used throughout this federal legislation and many use this to their advantage for revenge, to deflect attention from the fact of mutual violence and to put themselves in a better position in divorce and child custody matters. With regard to prosecution, domestic violence laws are usually decided on the legal concept of “preponderance of the evidence” rather than “innocent until proven guilty.”

This means without any forensic evidence, or indeed any evidence other than the accusations of a plaintiff, a Judge can still find guilt if he/she believes that violence “likely” occurred. The problem with this thinking is that judges are politically motivated and want to stay in the graces of the Domestic Violence Industry. Consequently many of them allow and enable false allegations or mutual combat to proceed to conviction for men only. [/tab] [tab title=”Statistics”]A Voice For Men believes that credible and verifiable domestic violence statistics are being ignored because the organizations responsible for gathering and reporting data have a vested financial and political interest in domestic violence being perceived in ways that fit with their requests for government funding. More specifically, many of the agencies tasked with ending domestic violence need for the issue to fit their worldview so that their organizations can continue to provide employment, fund programs and services, and garner political influence using government money.

When looking at domestic violence statistics, the numbers are all over the board with one organization reporting that men commit domestic violence 95% of the time, and another reporting that domestic violence occurs at even rates between men and women. Until governments get serious about ending all violence, instead of using violence to push gender specific agendas, we will likely never have true statistics on the problem. Currently, virtually all organizational methods for collecting statistics do not get counted as domestic violence when women hit men. Men often fear reporting violence perpetuated against them and few law enforcement agencies and judges want to talk about violence against men.[/tab] [tab title=”VAWA”]The Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) was first enacted into federal law on September 13, 1994. It was considered ground breaking legislation by then President Bill Clinton.

Unfortunately, it only addressed violence by men against women. It completely overlooks violence against men and children perpetrated by women, and violence in the LGBT community that we now know exists at equal rates to heterosexual relationships. In the past eight years, VAWA has transformed itself from domestic violence legislation to a massive industry that hinges on and supports the idea that there is a “War on Women” being waged by men and is routinely used to drum up support from targeted women voters. The Violence Against Women Act is frequently used in the United States to piggyback other controversial legislation. By attaching other laws to VAWA it is easier to deter objection on the grounds that if you object, you must support bruised and beaten women.

As we discussed in our section on Domestic Violence laws, there is very dangerous wording in VAWA that guarantees violence committed by Men and it has devastating effects on Men and Women in their families.[/tab] [tab title=”Funding and Industry”]When talking about Domestic Violence funding, it is important to note that federal money allocated to responding to domestic violence is currently at $460 billion dollars annually and is not distributed  to victims of proven violence.

In reality, the majority of this money goes to non-profit organizations, political action committees, training, law enforcement, and other groups. This has set up what many call the Domestic Violence Industry that, as stated earlier, relies on federal money to complete their missions, often which have nothing to do with serving victims.

Of course, Congress is not going to continue this level of funding if domestic violence is eradicated, so this incentivizes violence reporting that finance these professional organizations. If domestic violence funding, complete with oversight and accountability went directly to victims, then it is quite possible we could start diminishing domestic violence levels across the board.

However, that would mean less need for government money on which political groups and other special interest groups feed themselves.[/tab][tab title=”DVPO’s”]Domestic Violence Protection Orders are actually exacerbating violence and research is now showing that they are highly ineffective and in many cases counter productive.  Consider your typical Domestic Violence incident, which means two people arguing, yelling, possibly hitting walls and sometimes exchanging blows.

The police are called, and the man is taken to jail. Adding a DVPO to this mix, the man in jail is now faced with being severed from his children, losing his job, his home and freedom. While many may say “Good, he deserves it,” they tend to forget that this was a situation involving mutual combat, and that he may be the primary source of support for his wife and children. Additionally, some men, when unjustly cornered in this fashion, fall into rage and despair, becoming capable of much worse than the mutual combat that had already transpired. While protective orders may sound good and feel good, they are actually a lighting rod for increased levels of violence.

Additionally, Domestic Violence restraining/protective orders are usually handed out freely by magistrates and judges applying the “It’s better to be safe than sorry” mentality in these matters which has systemic and lasting consequences in future employment, constitutional rights, and reputation for, men, and their children, even if they are not found guilty.[/tab][tab title=”False Allegations”]A Voice For Men believes that false allegations of domestic violence are at epidemic levels. Over 1,000,000 restraining orders are issued each year in American Family Courts. They are “normal” part of divorce strategy. What fuels false allegations is clear.

By lowering the definition of violence so low and applying subjective criteria for having police over to your house to automatically arrest a man, and given that the courts do not require evidence to gain a conviction, and the fact that a lot of money hinges on these false allegation being adjudicated guilty, this sets the stage for a complainant to make this allegation without any fear of repercussions. We have many examples of women who were found guilty of making false allegations that routinely walk out of courtrooms with nothing more than a stern warning from a Judge.

These allegations are becoming quite ordinary and expected for the simple reason that they work. They provide the accuser a solid leg up strategically, enabling them to take control of a marriages assets and property with no evidence justifying it.[/tab][tab title=”Domestic Violence Analogy”]If you are reading this article and still compelled to demand that domestic violence laws remain centered around women because you believe that men far outnumber women abusers then I would like to provide this simple analogy to demonstrate how dangerous your thinking is.

If a woman walks into a daycare and harms eight children and a man walks into another daycare and hurts only three children then the woman has hurt far greater numbers of children. But if we suggested that new laws needed to be drafted to prevent women from entering daycare facilities on these grounds, then the mainstream media and women’s rights groups would be outraged that we are singling out the Woman only. And, they would be right in doing so. Not just because it is unfair to condemn all women based on the actions of a minority, but because the three children that were hurt also matter. It is not about who hurt more children, it is about all the children being hurt.

In virtually all social problems we face, none are as focused on gender as domestic violence. And that bias is clearly reflected in our laws and statistics.[/tab][tab title=”Mandatory Arrest”]Much like Protective Orders, while they may feel good and sound good on news reports, the reality is all they do is further compound the issue which escalates further hostility — especially when the situation revolves around mutual conflict and violence. As we see in Erin Pizzey’s video below, rarely are Domestic Violence situations one-sided involving a man just coming home from work one afternoon and deciding to beat his wife.

Taking a highly volatile situation and adding in a mandatory arrest which causes loss of employment, further financial problems, inflaming untreated emotional or psychological orders, and you have set the stage for greater violence. According to a Harvard University study, when states enact mandatory arrest policies, the intimate partner homicide rate increases by 57%. (Source: Iyengar R. Does the certainty of arrest reduce domestic violence? Evidence from mandatory and recommended arrest laws. Cambridge, MA: National Bureau of Economic Research, 2007.) This means that over 600 persons a year, most of them women, are murdered as a result of these polices.

Prosecution, jail, and causing someone to lose their job, reputation, and adding to further financial difficulty is never going to work, and pretending that all domestic violence incidents are men’s fault only contributes to the problem. The only way to effectively address domestic violence is by addressing the underlying issues that lead to ineffective coping skills. Of course, I am sure the radical feminist love seeing Men carted off to jail and losing everything thing they own, but in retrospect all they are doing is creating an environment that assures future violence. Mandatory arrests are simply not working.[/tab][/tabs]

Laws and Statistics on Violence


Women Supporting Reforming Domestic Violence Laws And The Violence Against Women Act

When discussing Domestic Violence, laws surrounding violence, and statistics, it is easy to imagine that a casual reader of this article will dismiss it as ramblings from Men who are upset that they can no longer beat women and get away with it. Therefore, this section of the article is devoted to the many women from A Voice For Men who have plenty to say about Domestic Violence. Additionally, we are going to provide links and commentary from other well established Women’s group who oppose VAWA and the current ways in which Domestic Violence laws are actually increasing violence, encouraging false allegations, creating false statistics, encouraging fraud, and which are centered around gender and sexual politics rather than ending ALL violence.

Meet Erin Pizzey. Never heard of her? Well if you have done your research on Domestic Violence you would know that she is a Woman who actually started the first Women’s shelter in the United Kingdom and is considered an expert on Domestic Violence worldwide. What we learn from Erin is that in order to end all violence stemming from domestic partnerships and marriages, we must do so equally and absent ideologies that Women are the only ones abused and that Men exclusively commit violence. To learn more about Erin Pizzey CLICK HERE.

From Concerned Women For America:

“VAWA has created a vast bureaucracy with an annual price tag of $455 million. Instead of addressing the root problems of violence and ending battering, the broad definitions of violence in VAWA mean that husbands are thrown in jail based on flimsy allegations of causing “emotional distress” or “unpleasant speech.” Meanwhile, drug-addicted boyfriends and alcoholic cohabitors continue to batter, and all men are assumed to be capable of violence.”

“The end result is that a bill that supposedly addresses domestic violence is, instead, a thinly veiled means of promoting feminist ideology, and anyone who dares to raise questions is accused of waging a “war against women.” In such a climate, rational disagreement is virtually impossible.”

From Women Against VAWA Excess, we learn how radical feminist groups are actually suppressing domestic violence statistics in order to bring to light “Patriarchal Dominance”, are publicizing articles that only show male perpetration of violence against women, and are obstructing evidenced based research that attempts to shed truth on the fact that women are equally responsible for domestic violence.

Phyllis Schlafly, an American constitutional lawyer, activist, and author states that “For 30 years, the feminists have been pretending that their goal is to abolish all sex discrimination, eliminating all gender differences no matter how reasonable. When it comes to domestic violence, however, feminist dogma preaches that there is an innate gender difference: Men are naturally batterers, and women are naturally victims (i.e., gender profiling).”

SAVE Services, a non-profit devoted to evidenced based and real solutions to ending domestic violence across all genders, is one of the top organizations worldwide that has an advanced legislative network that talks with Congress daily on ways to bring rational and humanistic laws on violence that have far greater outcomes than the Violence Against Women Act does. And, the board and legislative team consist of many women.

But there is another group of women who should be concerned about domestic violence reform that we rarely hear about. These women have a tremendous reason to see new laws and consciousness regarding violence change from our current thinking that “Men are Bad” and “Women are Good” ideology pushed by thousands of organizations and non-profits across the world. They are the second wives who’s husband are unable to see their children because of a false allegation, grandmothers who have not seen their grandchildren in a decade because of protective orders brought from custodial mothers who wanted to gain tactical advantage in child custody matters, sisters of men who have witnessed mutual combat between her brother and wife/ex-wife where he was the only one held accountable, and daughters of fathers who learned at 18 that her father was actually wanting to be involved in her life, but was either moved 5 states away, or prevented from contacting her because he yelled one night and the police were called.

Other Women who have an interest in seeing domestic violence reform, and who should be concerned about men’s right in general are the many hundreds of millions of custodial mothers all over the world who have male children that will one day face a system where he is likely to be alienated and marginalized in his child’s life because of a family court system that allows false allegations of domestic violence to proceed to conviction, or who will find himself on the wrong side of a judge who has been trained (thanks to VAWA) that his yelling is considered domestic violence under the law.

You think this does not happen? You think that evidence will exonerate him? That’s how the erroneous idea that false allegations only represent a fraction of all domestic violence cases is perpetuated Please do research on “preponderance of the evidence” vs. “innocent until proven guilty” and how these legal definitions influence domestic violence laws that are alienating tens of millions of paternal grandmothers (former custodial mothers no less) from their grandchildren each year.

The Future of Domestic Violence Laws, The Violence Against Women Act, and The Family Courts

Domestic violence laws and complaints have always been used in the family courts worldwide as a tactical tool to put the opposing party in a bad situation in divorce and in child custody matters. Although, I’m not sure why given the century old history of marginalizing men in the family court process whether they had any history of violence or not.

What is clear is that there is a massive push by many father’s rights groups, some psychologists and others around the idea that equally shared parenting is the best approach after a divorce or separation. And, there are many US States stating to take a close look at shared parenting. We are even starting to see this take place in the United Kingdom, Canada, and other countries (although unfortunately to a lesser degree).

A Voice For Men believes that shared parenting scares organizations that advocate on behalf of women who have become accustomed to the control, access to social services, and the freedom to relocate after a divorce that custody has afforded  them historically. In 2012, the National Organization For Women’s foundation released their annual report on Family Law in the Fall of 2012 which began with the opening sentence:


This Special Report of the NOW Family Law Ad Hoc Advisory Committee focuses on the destructive ability of abusive parents (usually the father) – aided by fathers’ advocacy groups or fathers’ rights groups – to deny the protective parent (usually the mother) custody of minor children. Discussed in this issue is how abusers deny custody, and the damage it causes to a half million or more children exposed to continuing physical, psychological and sexual abuse.

Clearly, battle lines have been drawn by major women’s advocacy groups outlining that the domestic violence issue will be how the National Organization For Women plans on attacking shared parenting initiatives when they arise. And it’s working. Virtually all shared parenting initiatives have legislative language attached to it mandating that if domestic violence is a “concern,” then equal parenting can not be considered — thus another incentive for false accusation and the issue of a restraining order. 

This will be beneficial to those that benefit financially and politically from the manufactured rise in domestic violence statistics, lawyers who make tremendous amounts of money from two parents fighting for 18 years, rather than equally parenting, and Judges who use bad fathers as election props. And, the behemoth of all lobbying organization known as the National Child Support Enforcement Association (NCSEA) will sit idle and watch this unfold knowing that if shared parenting is realized, there will be fewer men paying child support which justifies their existence and political stature.

The combined power of the National Organization For Women, Bar Association/Lawyers Groups, the Child Support Enforcement Lobby, and other groups have always used domestic violence as a reason why it’s best to have a “mother take all” family law system. Because you, your sons, your brothers, your fathers, and your new husbands are natural abusers, which of course maintains their agendas.

Having said all this, I want to make it very clear to women in paternal families that you are equally devastated by this ideology and we are looking to you to join in this fight to oppose these groups because your presence in your grandchildren, step-children, and nieces and nephews lives are at stake.

A Voice For Men Supporter Comments on Domestic Violence Laws and Statistics From The United States, Canada, Australia, The United Kingdom, India and Others

Perhaps the most important part of this article on domestic violence laws, statistics, and other information as it relates to the Men’s Human Rights Movement is for others reading this document to hear your stories; be it as a father, paternal grandmother, step-mother, aunt/uncle, or other family member.

Using the form below we encourage you to submit well thought out, succinct, and hard hitting examples of how bad domestic violence laws have affected you. Once received, we will add your thoughts to this section so we ask that you be as brief as possible so that this document does not become so big that it’s loses it’s readability.

Furthermore, you will not be identified in the post. Lastly, I can not begin to convey how important it is to share this article on the major social networking sites with the hundreds of millions of Men and Women worldwide who have an interest in Men’s Rights, and who see bad Domestic Violence laws and statistics hurting innocent alleged perpetrators.

About Michael Sharron

Michael lives in Eastern NC and is new to the Men's Human Rights Movement. His contributions to AVfM will expose radical feminists in North Carolina and their attacks on Fathers and Women in Paternal Families.

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  • Paul Elam

    I want to encourage as many people as possible to participate in this project be sending your story in and passing this document around far and wide.

    We can make a difference in more way that one. Not only will people get the truth, but by making this a living document with updated content, we may be able to push this document up to the top of search results for “domestic violence” which currently gets over 2,000,000 searches per MONTH.

    I don’t need to tell anyone here to “do the math.”

    Thank you, Michael for a great effort.

  • Disorderly Conduct
    Here’s a document published by the University of New Hampshire, by professor of sociology Murray Straus. It cites over 200 studies on domestic violence who found equal rates of abuse and aggression by both partners, and examines reasons why these studies have been suppressed and ignored.
    Another document written by Nicola Graham-Kevan of the University of Central Lancashire providing commentary on Straus’s paper. It goes into detail about the “concealment and distortion” of the evidence throughout the decades by feminists, including harassment, obstructing research funding and bomb threats. If you’re skeptical about how all these facts could be true if you’ve never even heard about it, here’s your proof.

  • MrShadowfax42

    “Analysis of Domestic Violence Myths
    … 50 domestic violence claims organized into eight categories, along with an analysis of each claim. Most of these assertions appear widely in domestic violence programs and presentations.”

    This is excellent^

  • yinyangbalance

    I am a survivor of female on male domestic violence. Yes my voice shakes when I tell my story (if I tell it). It is also very hard for me not to get angry when I get flashbacks or recount my story. I’m a big guy and I allowed a female to give me black eyes, to threaten me with hammers and knives but those scars heal, what sticks with me since is the mental/emotional and financial abuse I suffered at her hands. I say allow because I made it clear from the beginning that I dont hit women. On another level, I was a typical Feminist man that trusted women merely for being women, believing that women were inherently moral. NOT! That image has been shattered, thank god. I see the truth. When it came out what was happening in my marriage and what she was doing, she accused me of hitting her when there was no evidence but everyone listened to her. Everyone including the justice system, and so-called psychologists (feminist wolves in sheep’s clothing) slandered me forever by making public statements against me (in my divorce documents) that I hit her back when she hit me so it was ‘mutual’, they also went online and found rants that I made on forums against her, took my words out of context and then put it in my divorce papers. Everyone helped her ruin me. Its been 4 years and it still makes me SO MAD to this day. I was victimized on one level domestically, and on another level the system did it to me too. The feminist psychologists say “look at him, all angry, he is obviously the abuser”. I have since renounced that position that I dont hit women, the feminists will say “see? he is abusive” well FUCK YOU, you MADE ME THIS WAY! I have never abused a woman in my life. I have since never been hit by any woman, and I have never had to defend myself either. But I always make it known, you touch me and I will touch you back. I have nothing to loose because i will be accused of that anyways.

  • Nightwing1029

    Actually, the figure you post about VAWA seems low.

    The original 1994 document was $2 Billion/year. I am betting the re-authorization that they say is only $659 million over 5 years, is actually $659 million PER year.

    Didn’t get a chance to read through the whole re-authorization, but the cuts that I did see didn’t equate to enough cuts to fall even that low. Definitely not as low as $455 million per year.

  • julie

    I give this link because there is a lot of researchers mentioned [to look up and talk to].

    • Michael Sharron

      Authors of this document:
      Joanne Belknap, Ph.D. Professor,
      Departments of Sociology & Women’s Studies

      Heather Melton, Ph.D.
      Assistant Professor

      • julie

        Thanks for pointing out who the author is for I didn’t spend time looking this up. The men’s study my community uses comes from the UK men’s groups and the only difference I’ve noticed between our men’s refuges is that we don’t put them through lie detectors (if the UK actually does this – I haven’t contacted men’s refuges myself in other countries)

    • Disorderly Conduct

      “Our own work is grounded in a feminist approach, starting with the belief that there is significant gender inequality in the culture, political system, justice system, and the like, which results in the gendered dynamics and rates of IPA.”
      …nice, they’re not even denying their own bias. They’re basically handing us the proof for their fraudulence on a silver platter. This is why we have scientists interpret data, and not ideological idiots.

      • julie

        I liked reading that too. To me, it’s interesting to know there is debate between feminist and other researchers. I personally think it’s about your environment for some environments will have the women and men equally sharing power in intimate relationships (IMO the more intelligent) and in others it will be one or the other more powerful than one or the other (lol, hope this is understandable). I’ve personally dealt with both environments and am careful before deciding in a case which suits a relationship.

        All I want to personally see is something available for all victims of intimate abuse so tend to like inclusiveness.

    • chris3337

      Julie, thank you for posting that link. It demonstrates to me just how stleathfully two professors of women’s studies can present an academic looking review article to drive their stated agenda. They concluded that only 5% of IPV is perpetrated by women and that too many women are now being arrested and charged for IPV when they are really the true victims, amazing. They used the method, as described by Professor Stauss (NHU), of citation bias. They attacked the methodogly used by authors whose studies went against their beliefs and then cited only those that would support their criticism. For each explanation they had on discrepancies in IPV rates, they cited supporting articles but left out dissenting articles. It’s amazing what passes as scholarly work when ideology seems to have more influence than science. The conclusions in the article are way off and what’s really a problem is that this article will not be critically apraised in academia but will be cited as fact over and over again thus adding to the “growing body of feminist scholarly works”
      IPV will NEVER be fully addressed because half the population (males) are not recognized. Articles like this one aim to keep it that way unfortunately

  • Robert St. Estephe

    Mrs. Sharron. This is a wonderfully rich and well-conceived presentation and project. As the tyranny grows with the cash flow it is absolutely necessary to document the civil liberties violations (in all their ugly variety) as they accrue.

    I notice you hail from “the Velma Barfield state.” Congratulations to North Carolina for putting a stop to the career of one of American history’s most accomplished free-lance misandrists.

    Velma Barfield, North Carolina Serial Killer – 1978

    • greg

      Robert are near Chgo?? I’m in. Evanston….

  • Kristina Hansen

    This is great! And the more we add the better. I will e-mail with links to info and stats etc…

    Thank you to everyone and to Michael for this wonderful living document. Let’s strive to keep it alive.

  • ComradePrescott

    I think I found a minor mistake.

    “…there will be fewer men paying child support while justifies their existence and political stature.”

    I think that is supposed to read “…WHICH justifies their existence and political stature.” and not “while”?

    • Michael Sharron

      Thank you for catching that sir! Its fixed!

  • MGTOW-man

    I say this with tears in my eyes…and I do not cry often.

    OMG!, Am I seeing what I think I am seeing? Am I witnessing the largest jump in MHR organization EVER? Is it blossoming right before our very eyes?

    Are right men and women finally beginning to coalesce on a mass scale—learning to realize the awesome importance of cooperation–a trait men must improve upon if they are to save their perspectives, and indeed the truth itself.

    I do think AVfM has taken a turn for the better—not that it was bad at all. But even great things can get better as they mature.

    It has taken on more responsibility. To cope with this important, sacrificial process, it has assembled a wonderful mass of leaders beginning to span the planet who are poised and ready to pounce on offenders of equality justice. Little steps become giant leaps forward.

    It is readying itself to do the very things that will get our truthful message into the hands and minds of males and reasonable females everywhere….And not a moment too soon!

    For the truth to work, being that truth is hidden away by feminist censorship, most all men and boys must be educated in ways that make them change their minds about what constitute a “real man”. (Sounds trite, but a very real obstacle to men fighting back).

    It is for reasons like the fiasco in Toronto, coupled with AVfM articles: “the Mens Right statement”, “Lurking on the fringes”, “The dynamics of male fear” , and more, which are so truthfully educational, that has compelled me to donate more money than I thought I could.

    Heck, with all this going on, I didn’t even need to read the “Spring fundraiser” article even though I definitely understand its purpose. I was already there!

    Too, the AVfM-NCFM merger relative to college mens awareness groups—an absolutely fantastic endeavor that WILL prove to be one of the most important updates to our activism thus far?!! WOW!!

    To those of you who haven’t donated, members or not, PLEASE DO! These kinds of goals and accomplishments will not be cheap. Feminists’ hate-money (disguised as helping women) will very unlikely dwindle, so in order to make these things a reality in our pursuit of equality justice, please sacrifice a bit of money. Do it for your children. Do it for yourselves. But just do it!

    Do it! Do it now!

  • MGTOW-man

    I have a couple of accounts that occurred to me and a friend of mine.

    In the middle of the night, when I had only a couple more hours to sleep before having to wake up to get ready for work, I was pelted over the head numerous times by a controlling girlfriend who wanted sex at a very inconvenient hour. I was never the type to shun her advances until then. In fact, we had a very healthy sex-life (so she was not “emotionally-abused”…give it a break… which of course is like telling a feminist-minded woman she has a “right” to hit the man, any man). I should have defended myself but was then of the persuasion that men don’t even defend themselves against mean women. (Not any more however). I had headaches all the next day, bruises on my scalp, scratches on my face, and hurt feelings. I wonder how many feminist trolls out there think I “deserved it”. But what did I do to deserve being beaten? This is why the VAWA is wrong to not protect men, if it has to exist.

    For a friend of mine in which I witnessed the entire debacle: His wife, being controlling as she was/is, threw a hot iron at my friend, her husband. His only “crime” was to not want to go to a dinner party they were invited. He was tired and didn’t feel like letting his wife drag him around to events he did not want to attend. (Sound familiar women? You do not like being drug around, told what to do either, now do you?). He suffered a bloody laceration, a burn on his forehead, and was admitted to the emergency room table for stitches…6 of them exactly—a lot for such a relatively “minor” assault. He told the emergency staff, with me standing by to hear, that he had left a hammer atop a ladder and when he reached to move the ladder, the hammer fell on his head. I could see the ER staff didn’t buy his account. His wife, (now ex-wife) didn’t go to the ER with him; she went to the party! This is why the VAWA is bad law! It ignores true violence if a woman performs it. It must be stopped!

  • T-Dawg

    Just a bit from the government of Canada….I’m not sure when this was posted exactly.

    • chris3337

      FINALLY some recognition from the Government of Canada. I see that Earl Silverman was acknowledged in the foot notes.
      I think it would be a good idea if as many of us as possible would email the Public Health Agency of Canada thanking them for finally publishing this acknowledgment of Male victims of DV and that we now look forward to the government actually providing some services (which they have not yet done) , but this is a start. Does any one know when this was published ? It’s the first time I’ve seen it.

  • Agent Smith

    Not a study in the true use of the term, but the reactions of the public shows all to well why this is an uphill battle.

  • prince_tybalt

    A couple of videos I’ve used in presentations:

    IPV victim in Britain:

    Violence to men, lack of resources, VAWA:

    Abused men in Africa:

    Louis C.K. raped on his show:

    • Jurgen

      That Louis C.K. video is some scary shit!
      The sad part is – that sort of thing is much more common that people will admit.
      One comment on the video even pointed to it being his fault because he would not fight back.

  • Jurgen

    Only in the past two days at work one woman has told me how she bashed two pheasants to death and another woman threatened to kill me, telling me she was completely serious about it, if she missed being able to run a marathon because of a cold I and many others in the business have at the moment.
    This is a biotech company I am talking about and these two women are highly educated one of them having a PHD.

    If I had threatened a woman with death I would have been out of the door immediately.

    The myth of only male violence is such a load of bullshit that I would happily blow it out of the water with a howitzer!(irony intended…)

  • bobbygitrplyr

    Same thing happened to me. Cant believe that as men we do dont have any rights. I think us men need to get together and have some bill pass on our be half. Its seems all DV laws favor the woman. I read somewhere that now over 40% of DV is against men and we no rights, not even in self defense. I gues if your man you should take all verbal, physical, psychological and sexual abuse and have no protection under our law. What ever happened to the saying “we are all egual under law” I guess the word “we” only repersents women. We men need to ban togetherand get bill pass into law that gives us protection as much as women.