Why do I do it to myself? Haven’t I banged my head on the keyboard enough?
My son tells me about some feminist online magazine Birdee.com and their latest piece on a man not getting a job because he has a penis. He said the article was something along the lines of “now we know how women have felt all along.”
So, I have to look, don’t I? It’s like an aching tooth that my tongue just won’t leave alone. And yes, there it is, the sacred babble in all its glory: “No job for a fella.” It is stupidity at such a level that I think it has to be cultivated.
Toby Dixon, the author, couldn’t get a job with his degree (profession unspecified) so he tried to get general office work. This also proved to be unsuccessful. He began to suspect that it was because he was a man.
So far, so good. You might be encouraged that there is some independent thought in a feminist website happening here.
He leads us further up the garden path with the idea that “female-friendly” employers might, just might, not look so kindly on the likes of him with a dangler.
And yes, when he finally got an interview, the female interviewer dropped this bombshell:
“Why are you applying to do a woman’s job?”
Tantalisingly, he even offers this insight:
“But it’s everyday experiences like this that are poignant reminders that sexism affects men, too.”
He was so close, so close to the real world, and then the sacred babble kicks in. He realizes that, “…as a man, I am better off when women are treated as equals.”
And, to show his sincerity, he put the last line in bold font:
“That feminism isn’t about women: it’s about people.”
You fucking moron, Toby! Feminism is precisely why you didn’t get the job. Feminism is why being a “male-friendly” employer is illegal and “female-friendly” is not just legal, they’ll actually get some government funding for it.
Had a woman been asked the question “Why are you applying to do a man’s job?” she would be the cover story in Time magazine. She would be interviewed on all the morning breakfast shows, her autobiography would be out next month and next year she’d get a gig on Celebrities Walking Backwards or whatever the next TV craze will be.
And the best Toby can get is a sympathetic ear on a magazine that supports a cause that fucked him over. And to do that, he has to say what a wonderful cause it is.
And so, shaking my head to dislodge the backspace and enter keys from my skull, I clicked on the next article: “So feminists hate dudes, right?”
Here we have Samantha Bradley explaining that feminist don’t hate men, they hate patriarchy. And there are some wonderful insights.
She had a discussion with a male friend, whom she thinks is a dick. Exasperatedly, she has to explain to him that feminism is about equality. It’s in the dictionary, dick.
But here, her female friend chimes in with what she calls “an interesting infuriating contribution”:
“Yeah, [equality is] what feminism is meant to be, but in practice it’s something different and is often about oppressing men.”
Can I just stop here and make a suggestion, Samantha Bradley. Listen to your female friend.
No, don’t think that by putting “Feminism is about gender equality” in empowering all caps with a fiesty bold font that you’ve just proved your point. Saying it twice and saying it louder doesn’t make it true.
Listen to closely to what she is saying. Maybe even ask her why she thinks that.
Maybe also have a word with Toby. If oppression is being overlooked for a job because of your gender, have a read of his tale.
Instead, Bradley patiently explains to us the tired old reasons why she is a feminist. As long as there are wage gaps, she is a feminist. As long as there are less women on company boards, she is a feminist.
And, presumably, as long as there are more men killed in workplace accidents, Samantha Bradley couldn’t give a shit.
What gives her away is the following lie:
“As long as one of the highest causes of death for a woman, both in Australia and the world, is violence at the hands of a man, I am a feminist.”
I’ve left the link in, if you want to follow it. I did. This is what Murray Strauss kindly calls “evidence by citation”.
The ruse is that most people would see the link and assume that the statement must be backed up by some serious study. Those who did follow it would find a CDC page that doesn’t say any such thing, but contains more links to more data than you could point a mouse at.
No one would click on all of those links, and again, most would assume that one of the reports would back up the claim.
But no matter how many of them you pour over, you will not find any evidence for that claim.
Instead, let me tell you what the Australian Bureau of Statistics has to say about the leading causes of deaths. For Australian women, the top 10 are all diseases.
In fact, in 2011, the number 10 cause of death saw 1,804 women dying from diseases of the urinary tract. Can you imagine how low the 70 women killed by assault was in the ranking? Too low for the Australian Bureau of Statistics to be bothered to give it a number.
And that doesn’t mean that they were all killed by men. That’s 70 in total.
As long as more women are being killed by falling over (950 in 2011), and accidental poisonings (301 in the same year) than are being killed by “violence at the hands of a man”, then you are a liar, Samantha Bradley.
She concludes that anyone who even refuses to call themselves a feminist is “inadvertently implying that women don’t deserve gender equality.”
No, don’t ask me why she says “inadvertently”. I don’t know why she is blaming people for doing something, but says they’re doing it accidentally. It’s the sacred babble. It doesn’t have to make sense.
And, for the same reason, let’s not ask what “gender equality” might mean, never mind what anyone must do to “deserve” it. Perhaps Toby might think he “deserves” a “gender equality” chance at a job.
Let’s not ask any of these questions and this battered keyboard might last another week, and I won’t have any more dents in my forehead.
No, Samantha, I refuse to call myself a feminist because I cannot speak the sacred babble. I refuse to call myself a feminist because I cannot tell the lies you tell so passionately.
My integrity is too important to me.