Bow down, bitches: Feminists go gaga over Beyoncé; don’t get the joke

By Tuesday, August 26, 2014, Beyoncé’s recent performance at Sunday night’s MTV Video Music Awards was all the rage in the feminist echo chambers. August 26, by the way, is both Women’s Equality Day and National Dog Day, and this coincidence captures quite nicely the shoe-chewing that Beyoncé just gave to feminism.

In the online journal Slate, Amanda Marcotte lauded Beyoncé in near-orgasmic tones:

Rush Limbaugh’s claim that feminism exists “to allow ugly women access to society” is going to be a harder sell now that Beyoncé stood in the dark in front of the glowing “Feminist” sign at Sunday night’s MTV Video Music Awards….

Which is why Beyoncé’s statement—a political statement, really—is so meaningful. Having her husband and daughter up onstage was a nice touch, too. Having dismantled the idea that feminists are just ugly wannabes during her performance, she might as well clean house by smashing the notion that feminists hate men or are somehow not maternal….

The VMAs were a testament to how much the public is ready to hear from women, and increasingly on women’s own terms. Whether or not you liked their performances, it was impossible not to notice that Nicki Minaj, Ariana Grande, Taylor Swift, Charli XCX, and, of course, Beyoncé, ruled the night. 

Like Marcotte, the Guardian’s male-tear-bathing Jessica Valenti almost swooned, but unlike Marcotte, Valenti then seemed to catch herself. What might be giving her pause, one might wonder?

The zeitgeist is irrefutably feminist: its name literally in bright lights.

As feminism’s star has ascended, so has the number of celebrities willing to lend their name to the movement. Feminism is no longer “the f-word”, it’s the realm of cool kids: Beyoncé, Lena DunhamAmy PoehlerKerry Washington and Joseph Gordon-Levitt all call themselves feminists. And just this week, after years of equivocating, Taylor Swift came out as a feminist….

What I’d love to see is this new crop of celebrity feminists strongly coming out in support of social justice issues: using their newfound (or quiet but long-standing) politics to create change influenced by that gender justice lens….

If celebrities want to cement their feminist bonafides [sic], they should educate themselves on the work that’s already been done and move forward with the intention of creating change, not just good PR. Because as exciting as it can be to see our best-known celebs talking about feminism, walking the walk is a lot more interesting.

So let Beyoncé lead the way with her hat tips to Adichie and tangible support of gender justice.

Obviously, feminism can’t hang its hat on celebrity endorsements – it’s a movement for social and political change, not a popularity contest.

In Huffpo Canada, Joshua Ostroff’s article “Beyonce’s Feminist Silhouette At VMAs Acts As Rebuke To Women Against Feminism” effused:

This year it was [sic] it was the photo above of Beyonce silhouetted against a single all-caps word: FEMINIST…. And to make sure we remembered that she is one, she posed long enough for that instantly iconic image to speak more than a thousand words to the young women and men watching from home.

 Elizabeth Plank at Mic also waxed positive:

Although award shows usually make feminists cringe, this year’s VMAs gave us hope. And it wasn’t just Beyoncé, last night’s award show was all about the ladies, so much so that New York magazine is (ironically) asking if there was a feminist conspiracy. As Eliana Dockterman at TIME points out, “This year’s VMAs were all about empowered women,” a far cry from last year’s Robin Thicke and Miley Cyrus creeptastic performance that had us talking about the lack of role models for young teenagers watching. 

Daisy Wyatt at the Independent was one of the few writers to note the discomfort some were having with Beyoncé:

Many took to Twitter to praise Beyoncé for promoting feminism through popular culture and for helping to break down the negative stigma surrounding the word.

However, others were concerned that the singer’s version of feminism appeared to have been interpreted as overt objectification, pointing to lyrics such as “Bow Down Bitches” and her sexually provocative dancing.

Although some came close, they all missed the joke.

Almost all feminism is based on some variant of  patriarchy theory—the idea that men, both historically and present-day, oppress women. Feminism depends on this victim narrative as the source of its moral suasion—it is the very fount of all feminist power. Every happy, successful woman, merely by existing, undermines this feminist narrative, and feminists historically rip down members of their ilk who sell out to the patriarchy by succeeding—success in a man’s world is a crime feminists cannot tolerate because it threatens their movement’s foundation.

A glowing sign proclaiming “FEMINISM” behind the silhouette of a wealthy, attractive woman sans pants is a symbol of female dominance, not the wretched domestication feminists whine about. Symbols of overt power, while briefly inspiring, are ephemeral and quickly turn into objects of scorn and derision, just as Duke lacrosse players were undone by a false rape accusation by a future killer.

Even Beyoncé’s sister Solange’s avoidance of jail for assaulting Beyoncé’s husband, Jay Z, is another proof that the feminist narrative is obsolete and women are the actual and unaccountable task-masters of the world.

The women of #WomenAgainstFeminism reject the victim narrative of feminism, and without realizing it yet, every feminist who was thrilled by Beyoncé’s showboating is inadvertently admitting that they think feminism is bullshit too.

The lines really are blurred, don’t you know.

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